#which I've done before at a dance club; it was great

[marlynnofmany]

I got a free T-shirt the last time I donated blood that says "This is my Halloween costume: I'm a blood donor," and it just occurred to me that it could be really funny to wear that with some fake vampire bites painted on my neck.

[emilybeemartin]

A whopping, like, 2.6 people have expressed interest in my recent adventures in watching Bean films, which is all the encouragement I need to present to you:

An Incomplete Guide to Sean Bean Roles (Investigation Ongoing)

Our guy has a vast filmography, and I'm not even close to being halfway through it, but I've watched a lot of his significant ones in the past few weeks thanks to a perfect storm of illness, injury, and lapses in client work. Crucially, I have created superlatives for a variety of them and present them here for your benefit. Disclaimer: many of these films are violent! Or have butts and/or tits! Some have dick! Some have dated bits that didn't age well! So, if you have triggers or are watching with young viewers, do your research first! Also, these are just the opinions of one solitary millennial! Nothing is objective! Nothing is real! I care not!

Okay, CYA done, let's begin. I'll get the two most obvious ones out of the way up front, otherwise they'll dominate half the categories:

ACT I

Greatest Bean: Fellowship of the Ring. I've said it before and I'll say it again, he achieved more pathos with Boromir than a lot of his other roles have allowed for, and every note he hits just sings. No debate.

Best Bean for Your Buck: Sharpe. For the best confluence of quantity, quality, physicality, emotion, humor, and action, you can't beat Richard Sharpe.

Favorite Dramatic Bean: Time; he earned that BAFTA fr

Softest Bean: The first date scene in Stormy Monday, where Brendan shyly gets to know Kate, slow dances with her, lends her a shirt and strokes her back after she asks if they can just go to sleep instead of have sex.

Most Dashing Bean: Vronsky in Anna Karenina, that uniform cuts, damn

Swooniest Bean: I know I'm supposed to say Chatterley, and he is undeniably sexy as Mellors, but there are parts where his character is actually kind of off-putting. I'll lay a good chunk of the blame on the weirdly ominous score, the very of-the-time depiction of dubious consent, and Joely Richardson's tendency to look like she's having the worst time of her life while shagging the hot gamekeeper. No, I'm giving this category to Stormy Monday again. He's just so gentle and genuine in this one, without some of the obligatory "heartthrob" overtones of his nineties stuff. He never raises his voice at Kate or manhandles her. He really does feel like some kid who just wants to be sweet to his girlfriend.

Laddiest Bean: When Saturday Comes, specifically the strip club and bathtub scenes.

Favorite Sad Bean: As a collective, he has some great grief scenes in World on Fire, but! The railroad track scene in When Saturday Comes?! That was RAW.

Favorite Mad Bean: Black Death; there are plenty of movies where he doesn't smile at all, but unlike some others, his grimness and anger felt proportionate to the story, rather than just rage because he's good at rage.

Favorite Bad Bean: There are so many great Bean villains (Goldeneye, obvs), but I think my favorite is Patriot Games. Bonus points for all the different hairstyles he has in this film (long locks-shag-shag ponytail!-buzz-wet spiky buzz). Also HUGH FRASER AAAA

Favorite Dad Bean: Wolfwalkers, where Bill Goodfellowe literally turns his own convictions and beliefs upside-down in order to protect and support his daughter.

INTERMISSION

A note on GoT: I haven't watched it. When season one was first coming out, it was during a time where I really couldn't handle watching any kind of sexual assault onscreen, and while I have a higher tolerance now, I just... don't want to. I like seeing gifs of Ned Stark and appreciate that it's one of his great roles, but I just can't make myself take the plunge.

ilysm you grizzled dead wolf man

ACT II

Favorite Costumed Bean: Odysseus in Troy: curls, leather, thighs.

Favorite Un-Costumed Bean: He strips in quite a lot of his films, so let's give it to Lady Chatterley for sheer screentime, exertion, and the bonus of being naked and wearing a flower crown. Honorable mention to When Saturday Comes for the totally not homoerotic amount of butts and also dick in the locker room bathtub scene.

Hurtin'est Bean: Bravo Two Zero. Oof, don't watch this one if you have an aversion to seeing pain, although---you're a Sean Bean fan, and we all know one of his MOs is being GREAT at pain. This one was directed by Tom Clegg, who directed Sharpe. Also lol at the sickle-shaped wound on his shoulder, which is covering his 100% Blade tattoo (he gets a lot of sickle-shaped wounds on his left shoulder).

Best Inside References: The Frankenstein Chronicles, where he plays a former Peninsular soldier, and every reference to his service is a reference to Sharpe, including shots of his greenjacket, pistol, sword, and flogging scars. Honorable mention to The Martian for the Council of Elrond line.

Most Unsettling Bean: Cleanskin for moral grayness, The Frankenstein Chronicles for body horror

Most Inefficient Use of Bean: Black Beauty. Despite getting high billing he's only onscreen for about two minutes and I'm convinced the long shots are a body double. Criminal.

Biggest Missed Opportunity: We were robbed of a Sean Bean Odyssey. R o b b e d

Funniest Bean: Deploying Bean for comedy is woefully underused, but he made full use of his ~15 seconds in The Vicar of Dibley ("Spring" episode). He's also hilarious in Wasted, though I haven't watched the show, only the clips he's in on YouTube, where he plays a mock version of himself serving as a spirit guide for a stoner. IMO, though, Sharpe gives him the most room for humor.

Favorite Character Quirk: In World on Fire, when Douglas is having WWI flashbacks and really coming apart, he kept putting his hand to his mouth. My modern brain first read this as talking into a phantom radio, but of course that wasn't right, and then I realized--he was reaching for a phantom gas mask. CHILLS. AMAZING. (Honorable mentions to the Mouth Rub and the Tongue Thing [pictured above]).

Most Nostalgic Bean: National Treasure. The concept may be utter silliness, but you have to admit, this is a fun movie to watch.

Best Dismount from a Horse: Henry VIII, he goes pshwing out of the saddle

Best Swordplay: You may think there's no possible answer to this, but there is---two moments, specifically: the preparatory sword-spin he does at Balin's tomb just before the goblin attack in Moria, and the four lunges he does at 1:26:22 of Sharpe's Battle. It's just facts.

Prettiest Bean Film: Wolfwalkers, hands downnnn

Favorite Bean Death: All right, you knew we had to eventually end here. It's Boromir, obviously--- nothing tops that. But if we're looking at other roles, I think Patriot Games is my favorite, followed by Goldeneye.

So! That concludes this installment of Bean films, though I'll be continuing the labor, and I hope you will, too. What are your favorites?

[arcanumofthestars]

sorry if its weird- I just got out of a toxic relationship and have been absolutely LIVING! for the Hazbin and Helluva boss boys being sweet! Could you maybe do something like ideal dates they would do with a reader? Anything really- just in the genre of like 'cute little scenarios you'd make up before falling asleep'

ps loved your alastor headcannon <3

Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss boys' ideal dates (part 1)

Sum: Where they would prefer to spend their time with you as a date.

Characters included: Alastor, Lucifer, Angel Dust, Blitzø, Stolas, Moxie

Warnings: none, it's just fluff, except for like, three curse words and Angel Dust's job (I've put a note on where that part starts). Reader is gender neutral, if I have missed a pronoun here or there please let me know.

Alastor

Alastor lived in the 1930s. That’s all that needs to be said. A really classy dinner in the most expensive restaurant there is, with low lights and candles. And live music. Oh, the live music. Hell might be a filthy place, but the songs are… well… heavenly. You chat and laugh and eat with the soft sound of the sax playing in the background, the Imp on the stage singing “Somewhere over the rainbow” in a sensual voice. Once you finish eating, Alastor gets up and goes over to the stage. He says something to the musicians and they start playing a quicker rhythm, which you quickly recognize to be one of the most popular dances in the 30’s, called the jive. And you’re not surprised when your date offers you his hand and guides you to the dancing floor.

After a long night, you two go for a walk outside, chatting mainly about the Hotel. You tell him that you believe in redemption, and he finds it foolish, yet adorable. After that, the conversation gets deeper. You talk about secret hopes and regrets, about your lives on earth, what you would have done differently. It’s the first time Alastor is being this open with someone, and you know it. Your date ends with him walking you back to your hotel room and kissing your hand gently, before he wishes goodnight and walks away with one of his few real smiles.

Lucifer

Lucifer gets easily bored- no, tired with all the “King of Hell” bullshit. After all, he’s just a father whose wife recently dumped him. And at first it was really hard for you two to get close, him being afraid you would leave him like everyone else did. You’re not that kind of person, and he knows that now. Still, going out can sometimes be too much for him. All the Sinners and Hellborn running the moment they see him, it makes him feel more lonely, even with you by his side.

So he prefers to stay at home. You two make something to eat, like pancakes (they’re his favorite, trust me). As you eat, you start talking about anything and everything- except ducks, that’s a sensitive subject. The conversation will most likely end with Lucifer showing you some old album with photos of him playing with Charlie when she was a child. After you finish eating, you cuddle on the couch, watching TV. He ends up falling asleep in your arms (you’re the big spoon and I’m not negotiating over that), your fingers caressing his blonde hair.

Angel Dust

Before you proceed, I would like to note that this work includes mentions of Angel Dust’s job. If this kind of content is triggering for you, I would suggest reading only the second paragraph.

Angel’s job is a great part of his life. He might hate it because of Valentino but it is what he does best. So of course he wants to show you his talent- pole dancing. The best place to do that is a famous club near the Hotel (one that Valentino doesn’t go to often.) The owner is more than happy to have the famous Angel Dust dancing exclusively in their business, even if it is only for one night. The show starts, and Angel dedicates the night to you, making all the sinners turn around to see the one that stole the pornstar’s heart. The Spider Demon doesn’t fail to make you blush repeatedly during the show, teasing you openly, in a way you haven’t seen before, not even in his movies.

After the performance ends, you’re too shy to even talk to him, a situation that ends with huge amounts of laughing from both of you. After that you go for a walk outside, and probably have some takeout, because, well, Charlie decided that four times a week the Hotel will be serving boiled vegetables for dinner, “so everyone can stay healthy”, and it isn’t exactly the ideal food for a day. You two end up dancing in the music of some other club in the city, hidden from all eyes. Angel is amazed with the fact that you can enjoy something as simple as that. When you finally head back to the hotel, he replays the sweet moments over and over again in his head and that’s maybe one of the first times he’s blushed from something like that.

Stolas

When I say Stolas has money, I mean you couldn't spend one milionth of it in this lifetime, even if you wanted. He's used to paying for everything, so he really doesn't mind you choosing where you want to go- even if it is the most expensive place in Hell. He has a small panick attack on what he should wear, poor thing hasn't been to a date since, well, forever. He is extremely nervous when he comes to pick you up, but quickly relaxes when you start a conversation. The place is absolutely adorable after all you chose it, and the food is really delicious. Well, I don't have to say much, it's your typical ideal date.

After you two finish eating, you go to the Owl Demon's house (or castle I don't think something that huge is a house). You stand at the balcony for a long time, gazing at the stars, occasionally making a comment on astronomy (after you found out about Stolas' obsession with celestial objects you made your own research). The moments are truly blissful, and when he takes your hand and guides you inside, it's the most sweet thing you have ever seen- he doesn't want anything but you close to him, to feel you scent as he wraps his hands around your waist, burying his face in your neck, trying to get as much of you as possible. Not in a naughty sort of way. Just you, him, and the stars.

Blitzø

Blitz simply doesn't have the time. Don't mistake me, he loves you, but his job is taking up most his days and even with Moxie and Millie's help, he barely manages. He always finds a way to be with you if not daily, three or four times a week. Sometimes you just visit the I.M.P. "facility" and tidy up a bit while he's away, maybe make lunch for everyone and hang out with Loona, who surprisingly thinks you're a very cool person. Sometimes you join him in his little "adventures" in the human world, after all it's a great workout and you have to keep fit.

If Blitz actually finds some time to spend with you exclusively, it will either be eating snacks, cuddling on the couch with him complaining about work. Or. The most extreme fucking thing you ever imagined, like, extreme sports or something. The Imp loves the adrenaline in his veins, and you do too, once you get used to it. After all you'd do anything to spend time with the man you fell in love with. You're a bit dazed afterwards but for some reason he loves seeing you tripping around.

Moxie

Moxie is what you'd call a lovebird. The stereotype one. He buys you flowers and escorts you to the car, putting a rose in your hair or something like that. His suit is literally perfect and you wonder how many times he must have ironed it before he came to your place. Moxie is nervous. Really really nervous. He wants everything to be perfect, but once you reassure him, telling him that everything will be perfect just because you two are together he finally gets to relax. As he drives you there, you constantly ask where you're going (he only told you to dress classy and he's not disappointed with the results), but he doesn't tell you anything. "It's a surprise, you'll like it, I promise". The place is absolutely gorgeous but you can't help but wonder how much it cost... But Moxie's got you covered.

It's the ideal date. And gosh you have so much to talk about. When it ends (the Imp implies every four seconds that there will be more), the moment finds you standing in front of your house door, starting into each others eyes. Because in Hell, you found a soulmate.

That's all for now! I'm sorry that it's too short, I didn't have more time with my upcoming exams. I promise there will be a lot more though! I'm already working on a part two.

The characters that will be included are: Husker, Vox, Valentino, Adam, Sir Pentious, Fizzarolli, Striker.

If you want me to add any more, feel free to ask.

My requests are closed at the moment, regarding anything else. I will open them again around mid or end of March, though it's not sure yet.

Thanks for reading!

-Selena

[weirdkpopgirl]

Crushed | Jeno Fic #1 (feat. Jisung)

Title: Crushed

Genre: College AU

Warnings: a love triangle is heavily implied, kissing is involved. reader is little insecure

Word Count: ~14k

Author's Note: Like my other lengthier works, this story took ages to complete. I actually started writing it last year and the motivation to keep going was very slow. But I was determined to finish this story and now it's finally done! I know love triangles are cliché, but I've always wanted to use it in a story. I feel like not many people will be interested in reading this story, but I do hope that those who do will enjoy it. Thank you for reading and please leave comments ^ ^

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~ cats and coffee

“Hyung, Hyung—that’s her!” The younger one exclaimed in a hushed tone, shaking the elder’s shoulder.

Jeno’s eyes shifted upward to you standing behind the counter, donning a barista uniform. Your dark hair was neatly tied in a half ponytail and the round, silver-rimmed glasses added a scholarly charm, partially concealing your features. While your appearance might not be the most striking, there was a soft warmth about you that made others feel at ease.

“Who? (Y/n)?” He repeated, turning back to his friend.

Jisung nodded with a dreamy look in his eyes. “Isn’t she pretty?”

“Yeah I guess so,” Jeno shrugged. “Is she the reason you’ve been coming here so often?”

The younger boy’s cheeks tinged red as he bashfully rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe…”

Jeno never thought he’d see the day when Park Jisung—who used to run away from any girl who looked his way— had a crush. It felt…weird.

“How do you know her?” Jisung then asked, brows furrowing in curiosity.

Leaning back in his seat, Jeno replied, “She joined Jaemin’s club this year. I volunteer with her at the pet shelter.”

To be honest, Jeno hadn’t paid a great deal of attention to you before. The first time he saw you was during the first week of the semester when you joined the animal volunteer club, which he was a board member for. Aside from first-day introductions, you appeared rather reserved during meetings and often kept to yourself. 

Given Jeno’s own introverted nature, it took some time for him to actually talk to you. Even though he was in his third year of college, he still got shy when it came to meeting new people. In fact, it wasn’t until the two of you were assigned together to work with the cats that you were compelled to become more acquainted. Your shared love for the felines definitely eased the initial awkwardness. Despite this newly formed connection, his interactions with you stayed within the club’s activities.

Jisung gaped at this newfound information. “Seriously? You never told me that before!”

“Well I didn’t know you were interested in her,” Jeno teased, taking a sip of his iced americano. 

Just as they were talking about you, you caught Jeno's eyes and sent a kind smile in his direction. He observed as you exchanged a few words with your coworker and then walked over to their table. 

“Hi Sunbae, sorry for not noticing you earlier,” you apologized sheepishly, briefly adjusting the frames of your glasses.

“No worries. You looked busy over there,” Jeno assured you, before gesturing towards his friend across the table. “This is my friend, Park Jisung, by the way.”

Feeling a bit awkward now that he was in the presence of his crush, Jisung managed a small wave. “Hi,” he mumbled.

The warm smile you kindly offered gradually put him at ease. “Hey, you’re a dance major right?”

“Yeah, how did you know?” The boy’s eyes widened, raising a hand over his mouth in surprise that you recognized him.

You chuckled a hint of bashfulness in your demeanor. “I saw you dance at the freshman retreat. You were so cool, I could never do something like that.”

Observing the blush on Jisung's cheeks intensify, Jeno couldn't help but smirk involuntarily. “Oh—thanks. I’m glad you liked it,” Jisung said shyly, scratching his head. 

You glanced at the clock on the wall, realizing you couldn’t keep talking forever. A part of you felt guilty for having to cut the conversation short. But you also didn’t want to leave your coworker by herself for too long.

“Well, I better get back to work,” you sighed, briefly shifting your focus back at the two boys with a small smile. “I'll see you at tomorrow's club meeting, Sunbae. And it was nice meeting you, Jisung-ssi.”

As you excused yourself, Jeno and Jisung exchanged glances, both wearing smiles that lingered even after she left.

“She’s exactly how I imagined her to be. Kind and sweet,” Jisung said, the dreamy expression returning to his face. “Do you think I have a chance with her?”

Jeno shrugged, lifting his drink again. “Yeah, why not? You should try getting to know her more though.”

“How am I supposed to do that when I get so nervous when she’s around?” Jisung groaned, holding his head in his hands. 

Jeno watched his friend sympathetically, unsure of what to say. It wasn’t like he had much experience with girls either—not because he had some irrational fear of them like Jisung did. In fact, several girls eyed him on campus. But he just wasn’t interested in any of them.

Suddenly, a light bulb went off in Jisung’s head. “Wait, can you help me get with her, Hyung?”

The male across from him raised an eyebrow. “Why me?”

“You said you're in the same club as her. Maybe you could invite her to hang out with us sometime,” Jisung suggested.

“We’re not really that close,” Jeno mumbled, contemplating his friend’s request. He’s never been asked to play the matchmaker role before, so he wasn’t sure if he could do a good job. However, he couldn’t resist the hopeful look in the younger one’s eyes.

“Please do this for me, Hyung. I'll do anything you want!”

The desperation in the boy’s plea caused Jeno to sigh in defeat. “Okay, I guess I can help,” he relented, crossing his arms. “But you have to buy me snacks for the rest of this month.”

Jisung pumped his fist in the air. “No problem! You’re the best, Jeno Hyung.”

Back behind the counter, your eyes flitted in the boy’s direction again. A smile crept on your lips, noticing the animated expressions on Jisung’s face in contrast to Jeno’s calm demeanor. They seemed like really good friends as if nothing could tear them apart. 

Little did they know that their friendship would be tested.

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~ an accidental start of something

The following Saturday, Jeno spent the afternoon at the pet shelter, where they gladly welcomed their club. He was paired up with you to clean the litter boxes, and you were able to finish the task sooner than expected. With some extra time on their hands, you decided to hang out in the nursery where the playful kittens were waiting.

Jeno observed you affectionately cradling a fluffy black kitten. He couldn’t help but smile at how your eyes lit up joyfully. It always fascinated him to see your reserved demeanor fade away in the presence of something you had great fondness for.

He chuckled when a kitten playfully pawed at the shoelaces on his sneakers. Jeno gently scooped up the little one in his arms.

“That one seems to like you,” you remarked, breaking the silence.

Jeno smiled, softly stroking the cat’s head with his finger. “Yours seems to like you too.”

“I wish I could just take him home with me,” you sighed, leaning over to gently nuzzle your nose against the kitten’s tiny black one. Unfortunately, the dorms didn’t allow pets.

He nodded understandingly, “I know what you mean.”

As the conversation flowed between the two, Jeno decided this was a good time to bring up his friend. “So, what do you think of Jisung?” He asked casually.

A thoughtful expression formed on your face as you placed the kitten in your lap. “He seemed nice. Why do you ask?”

“Well, we’re planning to see a movie tomorrow,” Jeno mentioned, a hopeful glint in his eyes. “And I was wondering if you want to join us?”

You hesitated, your eyes momentarily drifting away from the adorable cat to meet his gaze. “Oh... I wouldn't want to intrude…”

“You wouldn't be intruding,” Jeno reassured a warm smile on his face. “I'm just trying to get Jisung to make more friends his age. That’s all.”

After a moment of pondering, you smiled back. "Sure, I’d love to then.”

For some reason, Jeno didn’t expect you to agree so easily. But this certainly made his job a lot easier. He could already visualize the male’s surprised but excited expression when he learned that you said yes.

════════

Jeno observed Jisung fidgeting nervously, as they stood in the lobby of the movie theater. The younger male kept stealing glances at the door, his excitement mingling with anxiety as they waited for your arrival.

Jisung clutched the popcorn bucket tightly in his hands. “I just can’t believe I'll finally get to hang out with her. What if I end up saying something stupid? Or if I—”

“All you have to do is be yourself and you’ll be fine,” Jeno interjected, putting an end to his friend’s anxious rambling.

Though Jisung nodded in response, he didn’t appear any calmer. Chuckling, Jeno gave him a reassuring pat on the back.

“Relax, Jisung-ah,” he said, “She’ll be here soon.”

As if on cue, you rushed through the front entrance, your hair slightly disheveled and cheeks flushed with haste.  

“I’m sorry for being late,” you exclaimed, trying to catch your breath. “A whole wave of people came in when my shift ended, and I couldn’t leave my coworker by herself.”

Jeno waved off your apology with a smile, “Don’t worry, you’re fine. We were just about to head in.”

He glanced over to Jisung who timidly extended the red bucket of popcorn towards her. 

“Here, um…I got this for you,” he mumbled, his words barely audible. The boy’s nerves eased when your eyes lit up with gratitude as you accepted the snack from him.

“Oh thank you. You didn’t have to do that,” you said softly, a faint blush dusting her cheeks. 

Jeno couldn’t discern whether you were touched by Jisung’s gesture or if it was simply your shy tendencies at play. Either way, the three of you headed into the theater room together and found your seats among the dimly lit rows. Throughout the movie, Jeno is mostly occupied with the plot unfolding on the large screen. However, he occasionally caught Jisung stealing nervous glances at Eunji from the corner of his eyes. Huh, he must really like her,  he thought to himself.

Two and a half hours later, the theater lights switched back on and people began to file out of the room accordingly. However, just as the three of them made their way outside the theater, Jisung suddenly realized his phone was missing.

“It must’ve slipped out of my pocket in the theater,” Jisung muttered, before turning to you and Jeno with a sheepish smile. “I’ll go back to find it. Are you okay with waiting here?”

You gave him a reassuring nod. “Of course, we won’t go anywhere.”

He smiled appreciatively before darting back into the building. Jisung’s absence left a subtle awkwardness in the air, a natural occurrence when two introverts were standing next to each other. In an attempt to move past that awkwardness, Jeno cleared his throat.

“So…what did you think of the movie?” 

His question ignited a spark of excitement in your eyes as if you had been waiting to discuss the movie with someone.

Though still appearing composed, you adjusted the strap of your purse. “I thought it was pretty good. I’m a big fan of action films.”

“Really?” Jeno cocked an eyebrow in amusement. “You don’t strike me as the type to enjoy the action genre.”

Your head tilted slightly with a smirk. “Why? Did you think I was more into cheesy rom-coms?”

“Kind of, to be honest,” Jeno said, rubbing the back of his neck. He couldn’t hold back a chuckle, having never witnessed this playful side of you before.

You placed a hand over your chest, pretending to be offended. “Well for your information, Sunbae. I happen to—”

Before you could finish your sentence, Jeno’s head shifted in the direction of the vibrating engine sound that filled his ears. Just as you also turned to see a red delivery motorbike charging straight towards you, Jeno’s body reacted faster than his mind.

The motorbike almost hit you when his hand wrapped around your wrist and swiftly pulled you back. As you stumbled forward, his other arm encircled your waist, holding you steady.

Once the vehicle had driven a safe distance away, Jeno met your eyes, which mirrored the shock on his own. His hand remained tightly wrapped around your wrist, his heart pounding in his chest. He couldn’t tell if it was from the near-collision or from how close you were to him at that moment, your faces mere inches apart.

Time seemed to stand still, as the two of you stared at each other with shaky breaths. The proximity with you sent a surge of warmth coursing through Jeno’s veins, as he realized how mesmerizing your face was up close. And as he gazed into your eyes, it was practically obvious that an instant flutter of attraction had stirred within the both of you.

However, that flutter was immediately overtaken by guilt. Quickly composing himself, Jeno released his grip on your hand and helped fix your position.

“You’re not hurt anywhere?” he asked, his voice slightly hoarse.

You also seemed to snap out of it, giving him a light nod in response. “Y-yeah, thank you,” you stammered, pressing your index fingers instinctively adjusting the alignment of your glasses.

His shoulders sank a little, feeling reassured by your answer. “It was nothing, really,” he replied kindly. 

Shortly after that exchange, Jisung came dashing out of the theater once more with his phone in hand. He returned to them with a flushed smile on his face

“Found it!” he said, “Do you guys want to go eat now?”

Jeno unintentionally met your eyes with a hint of hesitation before you turned to Jisung with a sweet nod. “Yeah, Jisung-ah. Let’s go.”

The dark-haired male trailed behind, listening as Jisung blabbered to you about his thoughts on the movie. His mind was racing with conflicted thoughts, and his heart still hadn’t stopped beating rapidly. Jeno cursed to himself, sincerely hoping this feeling would quickly fade away. 

Because if he wasn’t overthinking it, he might have just fallen for his best friend’s crush.

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~ getting too close

The university cafeteria hummed with the usual midday energy as Jeno spotted Jisung already seated at a table on the far right. Holding the metal tray of heaping food steadily in his hands, Jeno began making his way over. However, his footsteps slowed when he noticed you sitting across from Jisung. The three of you had never eaten lunch together before.

For a moment, Jeno contemplated just leaving and finding somewhere else to eat. No matter how hard he tried, his mind kept drifting to you since the incident that occurred a few days ago. The worst part was that he knew it was wrong to think about the first girl with whom Jisung avidly expressed his infatuation. Jeno repeatedly told himself that whatever he was feeling was temporary and would eventually go away if he ignored them.

“Jeno Hyung!” The sound of Jisung’s deep voice snapped him out of his thoughts. Jeno’s eyes flitted to the younger male, who waved his hand for him to come join them.

Knowing it would be hard to escape, Jeno’s feet reluctantly started moving again. He tried to appear as casual as possible as he took a seat next to Jisung.

“Glad I found you,” he mumbled, before briefly turning to greet you. “Hey, (Y/n)-ssi.”

You bowed your head politely. “It’s nice to see you, Jeno Sunbae.”

Jeno couldn’t help but detect an inexplicable layer beneath the typically reserved smile you were giving him. Maybe he hadn’t been the only one who couldn’t shake off the thoughts of what happened not too long ago. He tried not to dwell on that fantasy too much.

“(Y/n) and I were talking about the spring festival at the end of the month,” Jisung said, quickly filling him in on what he missed before he arrived. 

He nodded, picking up his chopsticks. “You’ll be performing with the dance team, right?”

“Yep, we’ve been preparing since the semester break,” Jisung said proudly, turning to you. “You’ll come to see it, right?”

Jeno noticed the genuine warmth in your smile toward the boy. “Of course, I will. I couldn’t miss something like that,” you replied affirmatively.

Your response made Jisung blush, causing him to lower his gaze slightly. Somehow, watching this exchange between the two of you left this gnawing feeling inside him. He wasn’t entirely sure why though.

His eyes followed when your attention momentarily shifted to your phone, which brightened with a text notification. Your brow furrowed as you read the message before looking up at him and Jisung.

“My friend Misun just texted, saying she signed up for a cooking class this Saturday. But apparently, all her friends ended up canceling due to schedule conflicts,” you explained, your eyes flickering between them. “She asked if I wanted to take their spots. I don’t know, would you guys be interested?”

Jeno’s mind clouded with uncertainty, as he turned to meet Jisung’s eyes. However, the boy’s eyes were already lighting up.

Jisung shrugged, “Well I’m not that great at cooking. But it sounds fun, right Jeno Hyung?”

“Huh—oh sure, why not?” Jeno fumbled over his words, agreeing without a second thought. 

You beamed, “Great, I’ll let her know.”

To be honest, Jeno wasn’t sure if this was a great idea. But Jisung already seemed so excited about a new opportunity to spend time with you and he felt obligated to be there as moral support. Although, he was no longer confident in how effective he could be as moral support.

════════

From the moment the cooking class started, Jeno didn’t feel too good. The class was divided into pairs. Of course, he encouraged Jisung to be your partner so the male could spend more time with you. He was left to work with Misun, who had invited them to today’s occasion. She was in the same grade as you were and Jeno vaguely recognized her from the university’s cheerleading team. Although he didn’t hate this arrangement, he honestly wished they weren’t stationed across from you.

Jeno was barely making any progress cutting ingredients for the soup everyone was supposed to make. His attention was drawn to Jisung nervously flipping through the recipe. He knew that Jisung was pretty much clueless when it came to cooking. However, Jeno observed you calmly instructing him to wash the vegetables, as you began heating water in a medium-sized pot. 

Your friend’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. “Don’t you think they look cute together?” 

“Huh? Oh yeah, I’m glad (Y/n) is there to make sure Jisung won’t burn the kitchen down,” he replied, quickly regaining his composure.

Misun chuckled, her hand hovering near her mouth. “Honestly I was kinda surprised (Y/n) agreed to come today, she doesn’t usually attend these types of events.”

“Oh, really?” he asked.

“Yeah, but I think she's been trying to step out of her comfort zone lately,” Misun nodded, swiftly adding the chopped potatoes he had cut into the boiling pot. “And her inviting you guys to come makes more sense to me now.”

Jeno didn’t need to question further to understand what she was implying. Their gazes returned to you, who was guiding Jisung on how to mince garlic. A soft sigh escaped him, unintentionally. You truly did seem to enjoy Jisung’s company.

Shaking his head, Jeno attempted to concentrate more on the task at hand. For the next twenty minutes, he managed to be more productive. Just as everyone in the class was almost done making their soups, Misun asked him to cut some green onions for garnish.

However as he was doing so, the sound of your laugh mixed with Jisung’s reached his ears. Without thinking, he looked up to watch the two of you. He wondered what you guys were laughing about. From across the room, Jeno noticed that Jisung seemed noticeably more at ease in your presence now.

As Jeno’s eyes lingered on the scene before him, his hand slipped and the sharp edge of the knife pierced the tip of his thumb. A curse flew out of his mouth, and he barely registered Misun’s gasp that followed seconds after. When he opened his eyes, he found you rushing towards him with a folded paper towel in hand. Concern etched across your features as you placed it under his finger to catch the blood that was already dripping.

“Hyung, are you okay?” Jisung’s panicked voice came from behind you as he approached. 

Trying not to grimace as the sting of the cut started to kick in, Jeno forced a smile. “Yeah, it’s not that bad.”

“Not that bad, my foot,” you muttered, turning to the teacher who had come over with a first-aid kit. “Chef-nim, is it okay if I step out with Jeno to take care of his injury?”

“Of course, go right ahead.” The chef handed you the plastic blue box. With the paper towel still pressed against his finger, Jeno watched as you briefly glanced back at Jisung and Misun.

“Jisung, you’ll be okay right?” you asked, wanting to make sure he’d be alright without you there to finish things.

The male hesitated for a second before nodding eagerly, “Yeah—I can handle things, (Y/n).”

“I can help Jisung too if he needs it,” Misun chimed in, “You two go ahead.”

With their assurances confirmed, Jeno soon found himself seated on a bench in the hallway beside you. His thumb pulsed with a relentless drumbeat, throbbing with pain. Nonetheless, he couldn’t help but be drawn to the way you were delicately tending to his wound, even as worry furrowed your brow. Perhaps, you were one of the few people who looked at him like that.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” he said quietly, glancing down as you finally managed to stop the bleeding. 

As you set the red-soaked paper towel aside, you reached for some gauze to clean the cut with an antiseptic solution. Jeno bit down on his lip, suppressing a wince from the sting of it, even though you were being careful.

Focused on treating his wound meticulously, you spoke without meeting his eyes. “You’re right, but it’s the least I can do. Especially after you literally saved my life last time.”

Though he wanted to, Jeno couldn’t find an argument against that. Once you finished cleaning the cut, you wrapped his finger with some white bandage. He noticed you pause after as you held his hand momentarily, before returning it to his lap. His eyes met yours in a brief, yet charged five seconds that made his heart pound—rather against his will. This situation felt too much like déjà vu to him. Was he the only one?

You then cleared your throat, shifting your gaze to look straight ahead. Subconsciously, you pushed up your glasses that had fallen slightly off the bridge of your nose.

“Try to be careful when using your left hand. Your thumb should heal in a few weeks.”

“Thank you,” he breathed, also having trouble making eye contact with you.

A small exhale was let out by you, before glancing in his direction again. Jeno could tell you wanted to say something, but you seemed to hold back this time.

“No problem, Sunbae,” you smiled at him, rising from the bench. “We should go back to our friends. I’ve never seen Jisung look so frightened before. He seemed really worried about you.”

The mention of Jisung’s name stung worse than the knife had. Jeno hadn’t even thought about him since they left, and he hated himself for it. This day was supposed to be for his friend to get closer to you. Not him.

One thing for sure was that Jeno didn’t know what he was doing anymore.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ the moment of realization

As the month flew by, Jeno tried but failed to limit his interactions with you. Hangouts with you and Jisung became more frequent, and the younger male often pleaded for his presence as moral support. Jeno tried to ignore his growing feelings for you. But it was hard when his spare time was now consistently consumed by being a part of this trio.

Then during the next club meeting, fate landed him and you paired to volunteer at the pet shelter again. He tried to convince Jaemin to trade shifts with him, but couldn’t find a plausible excuse without risking his secret being exposed or accidentally casting you in a negative light.

So he unfortunately found himself in the back room, folding freshly cleaned laundry alongside you. As the piles of white towels and soft cat beds grew around them, Jeno couldn’t help but steal occasional glances at you, observing how you folded the towels so meticulously. If you sensed his gaze on you, Jeno couldn’t tell.

“I’m looking forward to seeing Jisung perform at the spring festival next week. Are you?” you asked, once again breaking the awkward silence between you. Jeno mentally chastised himself for not initiating the conversation himself.

He nodded, mustering a tentative smile. “Yeah, I am. Jisung shines the most when he’s dancing.”

Before Jeno could hear your agreement, a staff member positioned near the doorway caught both of your attention. “Can you guys bring some kittens back to their condos from the private room?” she asked politely, her eyes darting between the both of you. “The customer decided to come back another time.”

“Of course, we’ll take care of it.” He heard you reply in the sweet, natural tone you often used around people in general.

The staff member sent the both of you a grateful smile, and stepped aside, allowing him and you to make your way to the private room. However, once you got there, there were no tiny felines in sight. As you mumbled words of concern, Jeno crouched down near the big blue chair to search for any hint of movement.

“Um, I think they’re under here,” Jeno said, his suspicions confirmed as he spotted two black furballs discernible only by their light green eyes.

You bent down to his level, your expression softening as you took a closer look. “Poor things, they must be scared.”

“Yeah I guess whoever came by must’ve unintentionally frightened them,” he agreed, extending his arm in an attempt to bring the kittens out from under the chair. However, his actions only served to make them shrink further against the wall.

Jeno let out a sigh of frustration, sitting up to see if you had any ideas on how to get the kittens out. He noticed the frown on your lips deepen, as you briefly scanned the room. Then, he saw your eyes light up with determination as you picked up a discarded cat wand from the floor.

With curiosity, Jeno watched as you crouched down and shook the wand, causing the feather tip to swish against the ground. “Come on, little ones,” you cooed gently, your voice sounding like a soothing melody in the quiet room.

It didn’t take long for the tantalizing movements to attract the kittens, inevitably coaxing them out of their hiding place. Jeno felt relief wash over him, as he finally scooped up one of the kittens, while you did the same with its sibling.

“Wow, you’re a genius,” he complimented absentmindedly, genuinely impressed by your quick thinking. 

You lightly chuckled, a hint of bashfulness coloring your cheeks. “You don’t have to exaggerate, Sunbae.”

As Jeno followed behind your lead back to the main room, he was unable to tear his gaze away from you. Something about witnessing you hug the tiny cat against your chest, placing little kisses on the top of its head, and whispering sweet words of assurance, triggered the feeling he had been trying to bury down throughout the entire month. 

Jeno held his kitten a little closer to his chest, feeling its warm black fur between his fingers. He knew then that he was officially doomed. No matter how hard he tried to remind himself of his loyalty to Jisung and resist the way you continued to make his heart race, he couldn’t stop himself from falling for you.

At that moment, Jeno realized that he was fighting a battle he was destined to lose.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ how one kiss leads to catastrophe

Ever since you met up with Misun for the spring festival, the strange look she kept giving you was making you want to hide. After enduring ten minutes of her burning stature, you couldn’t take it anymore. When you finally sat down at one of the food stalls, waiting for the guys to arrive, you decided to speak up.

“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” you asked, wondering if you had done something to upset her.

Misun continued to eye you suspiciously. “Do you have a crush on Lee Jeno?” she answered with a question that immediately caught you off guard.

“W-what?” you laughed as if she just made a ridiculous statement. “No, I don’t…I mean… is it that obvious?” 

A smirk of satisfaction stretched across Misun’s lips as she saw your cheeks heating up as you anxiously awaited her response.

Casually leaning back in her seat, she crossed her arms. “Not necessarily. At first, I thought you liked Jisung. But then I started to wonder if it was Jeno after seeing you rush over to help him when he cut his finger.”

“So it is obvious,” you groaned in embarrassment, hiding your face in your hands. It was a good thing the guys hadn’t arrived yet, or else you’d be such an awkward mess.

Amusement danced in Misun’s eyes as she leaned forward on the table. “I can’t believe (L/n) (Y/n) has a crush on someone. When did you start liking him?” she asked.

You pondered for a bit, tracing back to the events that occurred this past month. Your social life certainly has taken a turn ever since you became friends with Jeno and Jisung. Although you instinctively wanted to decline Jeno’s first invitation to hang out, Misun’s constantly chastising you for antisocial tendencies. In fact, she was the one who pushed you to join the animal volunteer club because she knew how much you liked cats.

“Well, I didn’t really pay much attention to him before, even though we saw each other at his club. I think it started after we watched a movie at the theater when he saved me from getting hit by a motorcycle,” you began to explain, recalling the details from that night.

Misun clasped a hand over her mouth and gasped, “No way, you had a k-drama moment!”

“I guess you could call it that,” you chuckled softly, lowering your gaze. “But the way he held me—so gently yet securely—and looking into his eyes, I don’t know…I just felt this spark?”

You weren’t exactly sure how to describe it. Honestly, you had been too focused on your academics and personal stuff to go anywhere near men. Yet that one heart-flutter moment with Jeno was enough to make you want to reconsider staying away from dating. It was sort of the catalyst that made you start to see Jeno in a different light.

“The more I spent time around Jeno, I just started to notice him more. Like how he can be quite funny when you get closer to him,” you continued, your voice softening with admiration. “He’s so good with the cats too, they always snuggle up to him when we visit the shelter. And he really is cute, like I don’t know how such a manly-looking guy can be so…endearing.”

Misun’s eyes widened in slight surprise. “Wow, you really do like him.”

“Gosh, I’m hopeless, aren’t I?” you mumbled, rather pitifully. You hadn’t even realized how fond you’ve become of the boy until Misun pointed it out.

 “Hopelessly in love,” Misun teased in a sing-song voice. “So, do you plan on confessing your feelings to him?”

Her question made your heart sink a little. “I don’t think so. He probably doesn’t feel the same as me, and I’d probably just make things awkward between us.”

You would be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about what would happen if Jeno was aware of your crush on him. But for now, you were content with admiring him from afar, hesitant to pursue anything more. Misun, on the other hand, did not seem satisfied with that idea.

“Okay, I get what you’re saying, but I honestly think you have a pretty good chance, (Y/n),” Misun said, her tone brimming with conviction. “He literally couldn’t stop looking at you during the cooking class. Well, you know—until he cut his finger.”

While that did intrigue you a little, you didn’t want to entertain any false hope. You sighed, shaking your head in disbelief. “Misun, I really don’t think—”

“Trust me on this. I can even prove it to you,” she interrupted, her eyes gleaming with persistence. “We’ll do a little test. When Jeno and Jisung get here, I’ll ‘accidentally” spill something on your shirt. If Jeno likes you, he’ll offer his jacket.”

Your brow furrowed in perplexion. “I don’t see how that’s supposed to prove anything.”

“Because it’s a classic romantic gesture,” Misun insisted, tapping the table for emphasis. “It’ll work, I just know it.”

Although you were skeptical about Misun’s idea, you worried that any further disagreement would be futile. Maybe you could find a way to back out at the last minute. Besides, this so-called “test” couldn’t even happen if Jeno wasn’t wearing a jacket.

To your dismay, Jeno arrived wearing a denim jacket over a plain white t-shirt. Your stomach started doing somersaults when Misun waved him and Jisung over to your table.

“Great, you guys are finally here,” she said, flashing them both a smile as she gestured for them to sit. “We already ordered food, so it should be coming out soon.”

Jeno returned her smile with a nod and settled into the seat across from you. “Thanks. Sorry we’re a little late…we got sidetracked.”

“Wah, you guys should’ve seen Jeno Hyung arm wrestling!” Jisung exclaimed, his cheeks flushed with excitement. “It was so cool watching him beat all the guys that challenged him. Even Mark Hyung lost, and he’s really strong.”

For a moment, your nerves faded as you listened to Jisung ramble enthusiastically. It was cute to see him raving about his friend, especially with Jeno looking embarrassed. But you weren’t too surprised to hear about Jeno’s strength. You’ve noticed the prominent veins snaking along his muscular arms before—not that you were staring.

“It’s not a big deal, really,” Jeno said, brushing off Jisung’s praise. Strange, you didn’t think you'd seen him blush before.

But you found it interesting how they alternated between being shy and confident. Their dynamic was certainly something you continued to admire since getting to know them. 

Misun chimed in, giving you a nudge with her elbow. “I’d say that’s pretty impressive. Don’t you think, (Y/n)-ah?”

“Yeah, definitely,” you agreed, appearing calm on the outside, though the somersaults in your stomach resumed. You shot your friend a discreet glare before changing the subject.

“Anyway,” you said with a smile, hoping the anticipation in your voice was evident. “I can’t wait to see you dance later, Jisung!”

You guessed it was Jisung’s turn to be shy, as a light shade of pink tinged his cheeks. “Oh, thanks. I spent all last night practicing, but I’m still nervous,” he mumbled bashfully.

“I always tell him he has nothing to be nervous about,” Jeno quipped, rolling his eyes playfully. His remark only intensified the blush on Jisung’s cheeks as he glanced down at the table in embarrassment.

You and Misun shared a small laugh at the exchange. “Well, it’s only natural. But I know you’ll do great, Jisung-ah!”

Jisung exhaled deeply, his hand resting on his chest as he met your eyes with a sincere expression.

“Thanks, (Y/n)-ah. I definitely feel better having you—uh, I mean, all of you to support me,” he said, his voice laced with gratitude.

The four of you enjoyed the convivial atmosphere and loosened up when food and drinks were eventually delivered to your table. You almost forgot about Misun’s subtle scheme unfolding.

True to her earlier proposal, she passed you a preemptive look before “accidentally” knocking her elbow against the half-empty soju bottle in front of you. You gasped involuntarily as the cold liquid splashed onto your blouse. And now, you regret your decision to also wear white today.

Misun pushed her chair back, feigning a look of guilt. But you caught the mischievous glint in her eyes. “Oh no, I’m so clumsy! Sorry about that.”

Though her tone was apologetic, you didn’t miss the mischievous glint in her eyes before she shifted her gaze to the guys. Almost afraid to witness their reactions, you glanced down at the unflattering stain on your blouse. This was a lot more embarrassing than you thought it would be.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it, Misun,” you attempted to laugh it off, though your grip on the hem of your shirt betrayed your discomfort.

You were too flustered to notice as Jeno started to remove his jacket. However, when you glanced up, Jisung was already shrugging off his light blue hoodie and handing it to you.

“Here, wear this for now,” he offered, his eyes filled with concern.

You looked at him with slight surprise. “Oh, are you sure?”

“Yeah, I have to change later anyway,” he said earnestly. “It’ll keep you warm when it gets cold later tonight too!”

“Well—thanks, Jisung-ah,” you said kindly, hesitantly accepting the hoodie and slipping it on. 

The grin on Jisung’s face stretched so wide, but you were too overwhelmed with a different emotion to pick up on it. Although you did appreciate his gesture, a pang of disappointment gnawed at you, and you hated it. 

Meanwhile, Misun was watching Jeno closely. She saw how he paused mid-motion, his jacket still halfway off his shoulders, and caught the brief flicker of jealousy in his eyes as Jisung’s hoodie practically swallowed your petite frame. However, Jeno quickly regained his composure and smoothly slid his jacket back on as if nothing had happened.

Jisung glanced at his phone and took a deep breath. "Well, I better go get ready for the show tonight. I'll see you guys later?"

His eyes lingered on you, noticing your distant expression as you pondered how things hadn’t turned out the way you’d foolishly hoped.

"Yep, we'll be right in the crowd to cheer you on, Jisung-ah!" Misun replied enthusiastically for the both of you.

With that, Jisung waved one last time to you guys before heading off. Jeno cleared his throat and offered to throw out the trash from the table. As he excused himself, Misun grabbed your wrist before you could escape as well.

“Okay, I know things didn’t go exactly as planned. But—” she started to say.

This time, you shut her down by raising your hand. “No, I don’t want to hear it,” you shook your head, voice filled with irritation. “This was stupid. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Misun tugged on your wrist with urgency. “You have to listen to me, (Y/n). I saw Jeno was going to give you his jacket. Jisung just beat him to it!”

While you didn’t want to dismiss your friend’s words, you found them hard to believe. Standing with your arms crossed in uncertainty, the festival continued as your mind was preoccupied with the thoughts of Lee Jeno. You spotted him engaging in small talk with one of the seniors who was running the food stall where you had eaten.

Oh, how you wished seeing the way his eyes crinkled into half-crescents didn’t make your heart skip a beat. As the festival continued around you, your thoughts remained fixated on him. 

Misun was right about one thing, you were hopelessly in love.

════════

Honestly, Jeno didn’t know what he was thinking when he had nearly offered you his jacket back there, acting almost out of instinct. Jisung was the one he was supposed to be encouraging to do those sorts of things. He hated how fast his heart continued to race with you sitting next to him in the auditorium.

Jeno could see the boy’s eyes practically bursting with joy when he saw you wearing his hoodie earlier. He should’ve been happy to see his friend make a move on the girl he liked. Compared to when he first met you, Jisung was coming out of his shell more, and Jeno wasn’t sure he entirely needed him to be his wingman anymore. However, Jisung had no idea how conflicted and inadequate Jeno felt in that role.

“Are you okay, Sunbae?” you asked, your voice bringing him back to reality. 

“Huh—oh yeah, I’m fine,” Jeno replied, scratching his head sheepishly. “Guess I just zoned out for a bit.”

Your eyes still carried a hint of concern, as if you weren’t fully convinced by his dismissive response. But before Jeno could offer further reassurance, Misun tapped your shoulder excitedly. “Look, the performance is starting!”

Both of you turned your attention to the stage as the lights came on. Jeno immediately spotted Jisung in the center position among the group. As the first song began to play, Jisung's body moved effortlessly with the beat. The group launched into a medley of legendary boy group hits from older groups like H.O.T and Shinhwa to contemporary acts like EXO and BTS.

Jisung led the charge, his movements precise and powerful, each step perfectly in sync with the music. The crowd’s energy surged as they recognized the familiar tunes and the dance team fed off that excitement, their performance growing more dynamic with each song. Jeno was always to see his friend who was usually so shy, transform into a powerhouse of energy and confidence once he got on stage.

Yet Jeno was focusing more on you, watching the way your face lit up in mesmerization as you were captivated by this side of Jisung you hadn’t seen much of before. Seeing you in Jisung’s hoodie only intensified the pit of jealousy gnawing at Jeno’s stomach. He couldn’t shake the feeling and realized he selfishly wanted to be the one to bring that light into your eyes.

He almost didn’t realize the performance had ended, except for the loud sound of applause as the stage went dark again. 

“Wow, Jisungie was amazing!” you exclaimed, gushing to him and Misun. “I’m so proud of him.”

Misun chuckled at your enthusiasm before glancing at her phone. “Well, this was nice. But I better get going now, my team leader wants to squeeze in one last practice before our performance on the second day of the festival.”

As Misun gathered her things to leave for practice, she bid you both a quick goodbye, promising to catch up later. Left standing in the bustling auditorium, Jeno turned to you with a smile.

"Want to wait outside? It's less crowded and quieter," he suggested, gesturing towards the exit. 

You agreed and soon found yourselves standing on a serene stone bridge just outside the festival grounds. He could tell you were still captivated by Jisung’s performance, not that he could blame you. The air was cooler outside, and Jeno was glad you had Jisung’s hoodie to keep you warm. Tall trees lined the path, their leaves rustling gently in the evening breeze. Though the sky was dark, the dim lights from the festival cast a soft, warm glow that created a peaceful atmosphere. 

As they walked along the bridge, Jeno heard you exhale. “You were right. Jisung truly does shine when he dances.”

“Yeah, he’s been dancing long before I even met him in high school,” he said with a hint of nostalgia in his voice. 

As you both talked about Jisung’s performance and reminisced about the recent memories you’ve shared as friends, Jeno felt his nerves die down a little. It was strange how the sight of you made him incredibly nervous, yet his body would automatically relax when you two talked. Despite not having much to say, he noticed your eyes focused intently on him whenever he spoke, and he could tell you were fully listening. 

A short silence settled you two, a familiar pause in his interactions with you, Jeno didn’t trust himself to speak, fearing he might ruin everything if he gave away his feelings. And just as the other times, you were the one to break the awkwardness. 

“You know, I don’t let many people in,” you confessed. “But I’m really glad I got closer to you and Jisung this semester.”

Jeno was slightly taken aback by the vulnerability he caught in your voice. Now that he thought about it, you had been somewhat withdrawn before he helped Jisung get closer to you. It wasn’t that you were cold, but he noticed you liked to be alone and only engaged with those you knew well, showing no interest in reaching out to others. He had never judged you for it, figuring you had your reasons.

He nodded thoughtfully, looking at you with an understanding smile. “Well, I’m glad you let us in. It’s been nice getting to know the mysterious barista girl who likes action movies and has a hidden talent for charming cats.”

“You’re so funny, Sunbae,” you giggled, shaking your head. Hearing your laugh was like music to his ears, as cliché as that sounded. 

The evening breeze rustled the leaves around you as Jeno saw you contemplate for a moment. “Honestly, I’ve really enjoyed our time together,” you began, your gentle voice sounding nervous but earnest. “And seeing you today made me realize that I don’t just see you my senior.”

Alerts went off in Jeno’s mind as he recognized the direction this conversation was taking.  No, this isn’t supposed to happen, he tried to tell himself, knowing how much Jisung liked you.

After exhaling softly, you spoke up. “I like you, Jeno Sunbae.”

For a moment, silence hung heavy between you, and Jeno knew you saw the conflicting emotions flicker across his face. He didn't know what to say, more so because he felt he shouldn’t say anything at all. Seeing your smile falter only made him feel worse.

“But it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way! I just wanted to get it off my chest,” you hurriedly added out of slight panic.

His eyes gaze into yours with the same intensity from that day he saved you from the motorcycle. So many emotions swirled within him, pushing Jeno to his limits. He couldn’t look at you without wanting something more. Before you could say anything else, Jeno impulsively cupped your face with his hands and leaned in, sharing the most passionate kiss either of you had ever experienced. 

Your lips were softer than he imagined them, carrying a faint taste of the soju you both had earlier. As he deepened the kiss, he could feel the slight pressure of your glasses against his cheek. But in that moment he didn���t care, his desire to be close to you overwhelmed any minor distraction.

Almost immediately, you melted into the kiss, as if you both had secretly longed for this moment. One of Jeno’s hands slid down to the back of your neck, his fingers threading through your hair and pulling you even closer. The other hand drifted to your waist, his touch firm yet tender. Your fingers curled into the fabric of his jacket, grasping tightly as you responded eagerly to his touch. 

Kissing you now made Jeno realize how much he had wanted to do it all those times. When he caught you in his arms after the movies that day, when you took care of the cut on his finger when he saw the affection in your eyes as you cared for the kittens at the shelter. Each moment he wanted to press his lips against yours and convey just how much you made his head spin.

The kiss only ended when the both of you started to feel lightheaded. The soft sound of your mingling breaths filled the air around you, and Jeno let out a soft sigh of contentment. A smile was about to form on his lips, until he noticed your eyes widening, looking past his shoulder.

That was when he turned around, only to find Jisung standing at the other end of the bridge, his expression a mix of shock and hurt.

The younger male shook his head in disbelief. “No way…”

“Jisung, I…” he called out, his voice already full of regret.

But Jisung didn’t wait for him to finish. With a glare of betrayal, his best friend turned and stormed off into the night. Jeno cursed quietly under his breath.

You glanced at him in confusion, searching his eyes for answers as to why Jisung just left so angrily. But Jeno couldn’t explain everything to you right now. He had to go find Jisung.

“I’m sorry, (Y/n). I—I have to go,” he said, reluctantly pulling himself away from you. 

Then he left you standing there, completely bewildered, the guilt already beginning to pile up inside him.

════════

“Jisung-ah, wait!” Jeno called out, his heart sinking as he caught up to his friend, now a far distance from the bridge. “Please, just let me explain.”

Jisung finally stopped in his tracks and turned sharply, his eyes ablaze with fury and hurt. Jeno has never seen him look so angry before. 

“I just saw you kissing the girl I’ve been crushing on for ages. So tell me, what is there to explain, Hyung?” Jisung demanded, his voice trembling with betrayal. 

His mind raced with regret, struggling to find the right words. “I…I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

The younger male scoffed, the memory of him kissing you still vivid in his mind. “How long were you going to deceive me?”

“I swear, I didn’t even look at her that way when you first told me about her,” Jeno insisted, his voice laced with guilt. “It sort of just happened…and I know how much you like her. But no matter how much I try, I just can’t get rid of these feelings.”

Jisung shook his head in disbelief, his fists clenched at his sides. “All this time, I actually thought I had a chance with (Y/n), but my own best friend goes behind my back. I feel like a complete idiot.”

Jeno’s heart twisted painfully at the sting that came with his friend’s words. He knew he screwed up badly and Jisung had every right to be upset with him. He wasn’t even sure if this was something that could be fixed so easily. 

“I’m sorry, Jisung-ah. I just didn’t want to hurt you,” he lamented.

But his apology wasn’t what Jisung wanted to hear. “Well you did hurt me,” he snapped, his voice cracking with emotions. “I trusted you, Hyung. You were supposed to have my back.”

Jeno cursed under his breath and reached out to touch his friend’s shoulder. “I still do, Jisung-ah.”

But the boy flinched away and took a step back. “I can’t be around you right now. And don’t follow me this time,” Jisung said, his voice stern and final.

With that, Jisung turned and walked away, leaving Jeno standing there with a heavy heart full of guilt and regret. He wanted to call out and explain further, but he knew there was nothing more he could say to undo the pain he had caused his best friend. Things weren’t supposed to happen this way and it was all his fault.

The weight of his actions left him feeling crushed.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ the end of first loves

The days since their fallout with Jisung weighed heavily on Jeno. Any texts he sent were left on read and whenever they crossed paths, Jisung walked straight past him without a second glance. Jeno swore he was on the verge of losing it. 

He was angry. Angry at Jisung for not hearing him out, angry at you for confessing to him at the festival of all times. But mostly, he was angry at himself for letting this all happen in the first place. He should’ve known that nothing good would come out of falling for his best friend’s crush.

Wallowing in his despair, Jeno isolated himself in the club room where Jaemin eventually found him. The other dark-haired male sighed when he saw the troubled expression on his friend’s face.

“So this is where you’ve been hiding out lately?” Jaemin remarked lightheartedly, pulling out a chair from the table to sit across from him. 

Jeno sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “It’s not like I have anywhere else to go. Jisung keeps ignoring me and I can’t even look at (Y/n) right now. They both probably hate me.”

“Yeah, I tried talking to Jisung and he still seems pretty mad. This was the first time he’s really liked someone,” Jaemin pointed out. His tone was sympathetic but it only made Jeno feel worse.

He slammed his fist against the table, not even caring about the sting it left on his knuckles. “I know! Everything is messed up because of me and I have no idea how to fix it.”

There was a tense silence that hung in the air, Jaemin not having expected his friend’s sudden outrage. But he couldn’t necessarily blame him. 

Jaemin sighed empathetically, leaning forward with a serious expression. “Look, I get that you’re in a tough spot, man. But you can’t blame yourself for everything. Sometimes things just happen, and people get hurt.”

Jeno slumped in his chair, the anger in him slowly simmering as Jaemin placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “What matters now is how you handle it,” he continued. “Jisung just needs some space right now, he’ll come around eventually. As for (Y/n), maybe it’s time to talk to her and sort things out.”

Despite the guilt that still lingered in him, he knew Jaemin was right. As painful as it was to think about it, he understood what he needed to do.

════════

Nearly a week had slipped by since the festival, and Jeno finally encountered you again at the pet shelter. The awkwardness between you was palpable, and few words were exchanged throughout the volunteer shift.  It wasn’t until after you changed out your volunteer clothes and prepared to leave that Jeno gathered the courage to say something.

Exiting the building together, Jeno hesitated before breaking the silence. “Hey, can we talk for a moment?”

He could see the apprehension in your eyes when you glanced at him. But then you gave him a light nod of agreement. 

That was how you ended up seated at a nearby café. Jeno fidgeted with the sleeve of his jacket, unable to meet your eyes at first. He noticed your nervousness as you lightly tapped the cold glass of your iced latte. 

You seemed to sense his unease and responded with a gentle smile. “It’s okay, Sunbae. Just tell me.”

Jeno could already feel his heart sinking as he heard you speak so kindly to him. He hated that what he was about to say would hurt you, but it was what had to be done. He had to end things.

“I…we…” he started, finding it hard to articulate. “I don’t think this is going to work out between us.”

He could see your smile waver slightly, but you encouraged him to continue with a nod. Glancing down, he stared into his own cup of coffee which had probably gone cold now. 

Sighing softly, he leaned forward to explain. “The truth is, Jisung was the one who liked you from the beginning. I was supposed to help him get closer to you…but then I started to feel something for you and now I brought you into this mess.”

You stayed silent, processing what he just told you. He could tell you were surprised by his confession. Perhaps you had been too focused on someone else to notice.

“Oh, I had no idea…,” your voice trailed off, unsure of what to say to this.

Jeno swallowed hard, forcing himself to continue. “Now I understand why Jisung liked you so much,” he tried to smile but failed. “And I really do like you, (Y/n). But… Jisung is my best friend, and I betrayed him. So I don’t think it would be right for us to be together.”

Your reaction was a lot calmer than he thought it would be, almost as if you had anticipated things going in this direction after the way things ended the other night.

“It’s okay Sunbae, I understand. Thank you for being honest with me,” you replied softly. Your voice remained steady, but Jeno could hear the underlying melancholy in it.

The silence that followed was so agonizing that one could practically hear the sounds of hearts breaking. Jeno could see you were struggling to hold a smile, and a hundred apologies wouldn’t be enough to express how sorry he felt about all this.

When you finally parted ways, Jeno shoved his hands in his pockets, watching as you walked farther and farther away from him. But no matter how awful he felt, he kept telling himself that things were better this way.

Later that day, Misun was starting to panic when you didn’t respond to any of her texts. All you had told her was that Jeno and you met up to talk today, and she hadn’t heard anything from you since then. 

Figuring you had to be back on campus by now, Misun ventured outside to search for you. Just as she was about to pass the space between the engineering building and the liberal arts building, the sound of someone crying stopped and made her pause. 

That was when she found you nearly crumpled to the ground with your hands pressed against your eyes, shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

“(Y/n)?” she called out cautiously, crouching down beside you.

You didn’t look up, but your voice trembled as you replied. “I feel so stupid for crying. It's not like we were even together.”

This heavy feeling of sadness was unfamiliar, a weight you hadn’t carried before. Confusion mingled with sorry, leaving you uncertain about its source. Was it disappointment? Betrayal? Or simply the abrupt end of something that never fully began?

“How can you not be upset?” Misun affirmed gently. “He’s your first love.”

Hearing her words caused more tears to well up in your eyes, and you buried your head in your knees. It suddenly dawned on you that Jeno had been your first love. You had heard too many stories of first loves ending bitterly, but you never expected it to hurt this much. As much as you wanted to harbor resentment for what happened, you couldn’t find it in you to be angry. Instead, you were left to pick up the shattered pieces of your heart.

Meanwhile, Jeno sat in a dimly lit bar, three empty bottles of soju strewn across the table. Jaemin watched sympathetically as his distraught friend poured more into his glass. It was unusual for the both of them to drink, a clear indicator to Jaemin of just how deeply Jeno was affected by the situation. 

“So you ended things with her?” Jaemin asked, eyeing Jeno as he downed the shot.

“It’s what I had to do,” he murmured in response, his voice hoarse.

His gaze fixed on his reflection through the shot glass, and he saw the misery etched on his face. Gosh, he was a complete mess. How had everything gone so wrong?

Jeno heard Jaemin sigh as he patted him on the shoulder, offering a small measure of comfort. “You did the right thing, Jeno-yah,” he assured him. “Maybe it’s for the best, you know?”

Maybe the alcohol had finally set into his system as Jeno placed his glass firmly on the table. Memories of all his stolen moments with you flooded his mind, and he felt the sting of tears springing to his eyes. Cursing under his breath, he harshly swiped at them with his hand, feeling pathetic.

Jaemin pretended not to notice he was crying and silently stayed by his side. What else could he say? He knew how much Jeno liked you, and it was unfortunate that things unfolded this way. If Jeno was feeling this devastated, Jaemin could only imagine the turmoil you must be going through.

Perhaps, this was simply one of those instances where nobody found their happy ending.

════════

Eventually, the sharp sting you initially felt was gradually replaced by a dull ache in your heart. Misun made an effort to lift your spirits was appreciated. Some of your other friends noticed your despondency lately. But you brushed off their concerns with the excuse that you were just tired, feeling guilty for damping the mood.

All the crying and emotional turmoil had drained you of energy. The smiles you offered customers at the café felt strained, and focusing on assignments required every ounce of motivation you could muster.

Having to see Jeno from time to time at club meetings only made things more difficult. You tried not to make eye contact, yet sometimes you couldn't escape the weight of his sorrowful gaze, which tugged at your heart. Even sitting in the playroom surrounded by cats no longer brought you the joy it once did, not even when a kitten nestled snugly in your lap.

Nervously, you exhaled as you stood outside of the dance team’s practice room. You had finally gathered the courage to return Jisung’s hoodie, which had been neatly washed weeks ago. It had been neatly washed a while ago, but you had been hesitant to see Jisung after everything, fearing the awkwardness. Thus, the light blue clothing had been sitting untouched on the top of your dresser for some time.

“(Y/n)? What are you doing here?” Jisung’s surprised voice snapped you out of your thoughts. The other students exiting through the door briefly glanced at the two of you as they passed by.

Straightening your posture, your mind raced to find the words you had prepared. “I–uh, I wanted to give this back to you,” you said, holding out the hoodie. “Sorry it took me so long to return it.”

Jisung slowly accepted the hoodie with a grateful smile. “It’s okay, thanks for giving it back.”

You returned his smile, feeling some of the tension in your shoulders ease. As you exhaled softly, a sense of relief washed over you. This was the moment where you could simply excuse yourself and make your exit. Yet, looking at Jisung stirred a mix of emotions within you.

“Do…do you have time to talk?” you asked, your voice trembling slightly.

The tall male standing in front of you remained silent, hesitating for a moment. Eventually, he gave you a small nod and you spared him a grateful look, heading outside the building to find a bench to sit on.

Taking a deep breath, you tried to steady your nerves. Despite all the mental preparation you did the previous night, you didn’t feel as ready as you’d hoped. Jisung’s tense posture made it clear he wasn’t exactly calm either.

“I…I just wanted to say I’m really sorry, Jisung,” you finally spoke, glancing down at your shoes. “I didn’t realize you felt that way about me, and I never meant to come between you and Jeno.”

Jisung’s expression softened, and he laughed awkwardly. “It’s not your fault, (Y/n). You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Though his voice was reassuring, you still felt incredibly guilty for causing conflict between him and Jeno. As a moment of silence passed, a pang of sadness lingered within you. Jisung had always been so genuine with you, yet you couldn’t give him the answer he wanted.

“I think you’re an amazing person, Jisung-ah,” you said, hoping he could hear the sincerity in your voice. “You’ve been nothing but kind to me, and I’m always at ease when I’m with you.”

Jisung inhaled deeply, a wistful smile playing on his lips. “Thank you, (Y/n). It makes me happy to hear that.”

Smiling back, you folded your hands in your lap. “I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings…”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Jisung sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Feelings aren’t something we can control, so there’s no need to be sorry.”

You looked up, surprised by the maturity in his response. Honestly, you hadn’t considered it from that perspective until he brought it up. But you still knew that this couldn’t be easy for him. Nobody liked rejection.

“I guess you have a point. But I know that the girl who ends up with you will be very lucky,” you said, gently.

He glanced at you appreciatively. “It means a lot to hear you say that, thank you.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the heaviness of the conversation hanging in the air. Sensing that it might be a good time to part ways, you stood up from the bench.

“I guess I should get going,” you cleared your throat quietly. “I’ve probably taken up enough of your time already.”

Jisung shook his head and assured, “No, you’re all good. I’m glad we talked.”

“Me too,” you hummed in response, definitely feeling like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. Following you, he rose from the bench and paused briefly before extending his hand. 

“Thank you, (Y/n),” he said, his voice catching slightly. “For being my first love.”

You could see the tears glossing over his eyes, tugging at your heartstrings. Trying to hold back your own tears, you accepted his handshake with a sad smile.

Nodding gently, a lump formed in your throat. “Thank you too, for being such a great friend,” you whispered softly, afraid that tears might escape if you spoke any louder.

With heavy hearts, you both shook hands firmly before parting ways. Jisung sighed as you departed first. Things hadn’t turned out the way he had wanted them, but he couldn’t just stay hung up on what could’ve been.

Despite the bittersweet swirl of emotions inside him, he couldn’t help but smile as he watched you walk farther away. For his first love, he could at least say it ended with no regrets.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ reconciling

Jeno had been navigating through days that felt like weeks, his usual routine disrupted by the absence of you and his strained relationship with Jisung. Even though he had done everything he could to make up for his actions, he couldn’t rid himself of the gloominess that clouded his every thought. His mind constantly replayed the events that led to this rift between him and Jisung.

So when his phone screen lit up with a message from Jisung, asking to meet after class, Jeno’s heart raced with a mixture of apprehension and hope. They agreed to meet at the PC bang they went to all the time during their high school days. Jeno remembered all the trouble they got into when their parents found out he and Jisung were skipping their after-school programs to go there.

Jisung was already there by the time he arrived, sitting in their usual spot near the middle of the back row. Peering at his screen, Jeno noticed he was already warming up with an old game they used to play. 

“Hey,” Jeno greeted cautiously, trying to keep the awkwardness out of his voice as he settled into the gaming chair next to him.

Other than the nod of acknowledgement he received, Jisung’s expression remained unreadable. The younger male briefly glanced up at him, his fingers pausing on the rainbow keyboard.

“Want to start with PUBG?” Jisung asked, his voice lacking the cold tone from their last interaction.

Jeno’s shoulders relaxed slightly, and he nodded with a smile. Soon enough, the familiar click of keyboards and the hum of the PC field the air as they dove into the game. Within ten minutes of playing, they were high school students again, shouting at each other as they fought through the virtual battlegrounds together.

“Ugh I died again,” Jisung groaned in frustration, leaning back in his seat.

Jeno shook his head with a chuckle. “I told you to go the other way!”

In the last seconds of the game, Jeno let his character die and pushed back from the computer slightly. The laughter died down as the flashbacks of recent events seemed to cross both of their minds. Feeling more response as the older one in this friendship, Jeno was the first to speak up.

“I’m really sorry, Jisung-ah,” he began earnestly. “You have every right to be upset with me. I should’ve just talked to you when things started to change. But I wasn’t being honest with myself either, and you got hurt because of me.”

Jisung remained silent, his gaze distant as he processed Jeno’s apology. After a tense moment, he finally responded, his voice calm but tinged with lingering hurt.

“I know you’re sorry, Hyung. You betrayed my trust, and seeing you kiss (Y/n) that night...it felt like you pulled the rug out from under me,” he replied softly, leaning his head against the chair. 

A familiar pang of guilt surged within Jeno. He knew his actions were inexcusable and he didn’t expect Jisung to forgive him immediately, or perhaps ever. Regardless, he was grateful for the opportunity to offer a sincere apology.

“But…” Jisung’s voice then trailed off, his grip on the mouse loosening. “I understand that you can’t really control who you have feelings for. And after thinking about it a lot, I realize I wouldn’t have known how to bring it up if I were in your shoes.”

Jeno felt a sudden wave of relief crash onto him, filled with gratitude for his Jisung’s understanding. He couldn’t help but be impressed with his friend’s maturity. When had scaredy-cat Park Jisung grown up so much?

“Thank you for saying that…and I really am sorry,” he said, his voice carrying genuine conviction.

Jisung waved him off, his nose scrunching in slight disgust. “Hyung, stop apologizing. It’s getting weird,” he said with a chuckle, reminding Jeno that not everything about Jisung had changed.

The two of them shared a laugh, and Jeno finally started to feel like things were returning to normal. Well, almost everything. There was still one lingering regret that stuck in the back of Jeno’s mind. Although he didn’t say anything, Jisung sensed it too.

As they prepared for the next game to start, Jisung tapped on his keyboard in contemplation before deciding to say something.

“You know, (Y/n) came to talk to me a few days ago,” he said, “I kinda had a feeling before the festival happened, but it’s obvious you both care about each other a lot.”

Jeno found himself blinking in surprise, unsure if he was hearing correctly. Slumping back in his seat, he shook his head in denial. “No…it doesn’t matter. I’ve already decided to step back.”

Especially not after everything that happened. Although his heartbeat still sped up at the thought of you and catching a glimpse of you around campus pulled at his emotions, he didn’t want to reopen wounds that had nearly cost him his best friend.

“It’s okay hyung,” Jisung said, leaning forward with a reassuring smile. “I can tell you really like her. You should be together.”

Jeno leaned back in his seat, his mouse hovering over the computer screen for a moment.

“Are you sure you'd be okay with it?” he asked tentatively.

Jisung nodded firmly, his expression turning serious. “Yeah. But if you hurt her, I won’t forgive you Hyung.”

“I won’t, don’t worry,” Jeno promised sincerely. “Thanks Jisung-ah”

The two exchanged understanding smiles before refocusing on the game. Jeno finally felt like he could breathe again. Now, without having to hold back his feelings anymore, maybe he could have a second chance with you.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ baby steps

Before immediately running to you, Jeno made a conscious effort to wait a bit. Despite Jisung’s assurances— practically fifty times now— that he was cool with it, Jeno still wanted to be cautious. He also wasn’t entirely sure if you still had feelings for him. Honestly, he couldn’t blame you if that turned out to be your response.

It wasn’t until the end of the week, during a club meeting about organizing a fundraiser event for the animal shelter later in the month, that he finally saw you again. The room was abuzz with chatter and plans, but Jeno’s focus was on you. You were seated across the table from him, intently listening to the discussion.

After knowing you for a while, Jeno noticed that you tended to stay quiet in group settings, listening attentively to whoever was speaking. You seemed more comfortable when talking one-on-one or with just a few people. Even then, you spoke softly and blushed easily when you felt the focus shift to you. But he found that side of you to be kind of cute. Actually, he thought your entire personality was quite endearing.

As the meeting finally wrapped up and people began to disperse, Jaemin caught Jeno’s eye. Without saying a word, Jaemin made a not-so-subtle gesture toward you as you packed away your laptop. Jeno’s cheeks burned with embarrassment, but he knew what his friend was encouraging him to do.

After exhaling deeply, Jeno pushed himself to approach you as more people left the room. Determined to take this step, he ignored the way his heart raced with a mix of anticipation and nervousness. 

“Wait, (Y/n)!” He called out before he could chicken out.

Catching your attention, you turned around looking a bit surprised. But you quickly recovered, your eyebrows raising with careful curiosity. 

“Oh Sunbae, did you need something?”

For a second, Jeno’s brain momentarily forgot how to form words. “No, I—uh…I wanted to ask if you have a minute?”

He noticed a flicker of uncertainty pass through your eyes as you nervously gripped the strap of your bag. Nevertheless, you managed a small nod and pulled out your chair to sit down.

Thankful for the lack of a negative response, Jeno took a seat across from you. His fingers drummed nervously against the table as he scrambled to recall the speech he had half-prepared. However, your patient gaze helped him relax a little.

“So, um I met up with Jisung the other day,” Jeno started to explain, rubbing the back of his neck. “We had to talk through some things, and I apologized. He forgave me and now we’re all good.”

Your eyes brightened at this news, and you placed a hand over your chest in relief. “Oh, thank goodness. I was really worried I ruined things for you two.”

He shook his head with a reassuring smile, “No, you didn’t ruin anything. I was the one who made a mess of things. But Jisung was pretty understanding about it all, which I’m grateful for.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” you breathed.

Jeno could hear the sincerity in your voice, which he appreciated. Pausing for a moment, he glanced down at his hands before speaking again.

"He also said that it’s okay for us to be together," Jeno said, hastily adding, "But I completely understand if you don’t want to give me a second chance. Especially after everything that happened.”

It took you a minute or two to digest his words, trying to process this sudden information. Then a small smile began to form on your lips, and he watched as your gaze lowered shyly.

“Well if Jisung is truly alright with it, then I guess I’m open to that,” you replied softly, your smile growing warmer. 

Jeno’s face lit up with relief and a glimmer of joy. “That’s great to hear because…I really like you, (Y/n).”

His confession made you blush, a giddy feeling welling up inside. Though he had technically kissed you first that one time, he hadn’t given a clear response when you first confessed. So you were elated by the confirmation that your feelings were not unrequited.

Being the socially awkward individuals you were, neither of you were sure what to do next. But Jeno stood up first, swinging his school bag around his shoulder.

“If you don’t have anything else planned today,” he asked with a hopeful expression. “Do you want to go grab a meal or something?”

Your smile remained, and you got up from your chair. “If food is involved, I’m in.”

Jeno chuckled warmly at your response, his heart beating rapidly with excitement as he held the door open for the two of you to exit the room together. As you both made your way outside, a moment of hesitation flickered between you. 

With the dynamics between you two having shifted significantly in just a few minutes, you were uncertain about navigating the new boundaries. As both of you internally pondered this, you exchanged subtle glances and shared a nervous laugh.

“Maybe we should take things slow,” you quietly suggested. “Like baby steps, you know?”

Although you couldn’t help but think of that passionate kiss you first shared. Back then, you and Jeno certainly jumped a few levels and things didn’t end that great.

Jeno was quick to nod in agreement, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”

The two of you stood there for a moment, unsure of where to start with taking “baby steps.” Deciding to be brave, Jeno gently took your hand in his, your fingers intertwining perfectly.

“Is holding hands okay for now?” He asked with a smile so adorable it made your heart flutter.

Trying to suppress your shyness, you nodded tentatively in response. The warmth of his hand contrasting with your own slightly cool one felt both comforting and reassuring. It was like that day he saved you from the motorcycle, his touch was gentle yet protective. Now that you thought about it, you got that feeling from kissing him too. But that type of thing could wait a little bit. Baby steps, you reminded yourself.

After holding back feelings for so long and dealing with some obstacles, both of you found joy in simply holding hands. Jeno hadn’t felt this laid back in a long time.

No more hiding or fighting his feelings. Finally, he could breathe freely and follow his heart.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ epilogue

Time flew by a lot quicker than Jeno expected. It felt like he blinked and suddenly three months had flown by with you. Since that day, his feelings for you only grew stronger and it felt so great not having to hide them anymore. Jeno couldn’t help but also notice how your smiles seemed brighter when you were together. Once the initial shyness wore off, your conversations flowed effortlessly, deepening your understanding of each other with each passing day.

The weather was getting warmer, and Jeno had fallen into this routine of walking you home after you got off your shifts at the café. The street lamps cast a soft glow, illuminating the path as you stroll hand in hand.

“You know, you don’t have to walk me to my dorm every night,” you said, gently bumping your shoulder against his. “Especially when you have an eight a.m. class the next morning.”

Jeno smiled to himself, squeezing your hand lightly. “Yeah, but I want to. Besides, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I let you walk back alone when it’s dark out?”

You sighed in defeat, realizing it was hard to argue with his logic. And if you were being honest with yourself, you did appreciate getting to spend some extra time with him. Jeno's lips curled into a satisfied smile, pleased that you didn't protest further. A comfortable silence enveloped you both as you walked, savoring the simple pleasure of each other’s company.

“Hey, don’t you think Jisung and Misun are getting closer lately?” you asked, the thought suddenly popped into your mind.

His eyes met yours with a hint of surprise. “You noticed too? I thought I was the only one.”

“Well, Misun hasn’t said anything to me outright,” you mused, “But I catch them exchanging glances with each other all the time.”

Jeno chuckled, knowing how you picked up on these things so quickly. Ironically enough, you seemed completely oblivious to how he used to stare at you all the time before dating.

Nodding in agreement, he added, “Yeah, and apparently Jisung saw Misun���s performance for cheer at the festival. I guess he’s been kind of impressed by her ever since.”

You felt a surge of excitement at the prospect of your friends getting together. Misun had mentioned to you that Jisung was helping her come up with a new routine for her upcoming cheer competition. Those two have definitely been spending more time together, and you were all for it.

“They’d look so cute together,” you sighed dreamily, picturing them in your mind.

Jeno glanced down at his shoes, frowning a little. “But not cuter than us, right?”

Your head turned to see the subtle pout of jealousy on his lips, making you giggle. After being with him for a while, you learned that your boyfriend tended to get sulky quite often. Before your shyness could kick in, you reached up on the tip of your toes to give him a small peck.

Gently stroking his cheek with your thumb, you paused to reassure him. “Of course not. I think Jaemin Sunbae said we’re the type of cute that single people envy.”

Any trace of sulkiness slowly faded from his handsome face, replaced by his adorable eye smile. His strong arms instinctively encircled around your waist, drawing you closer to him. Gazing lovingly into your eyes, he brushed back a lock of hair behind your ear. The familiar unspoken attraction crackled in the air and the two of you leaned in naturally for a sweet kiss.

Unlike your first kiss, this one unfolded slowly, with the passion simmering gently between you. Jeno easily forgot everything around him, one of his hands getting lost in your hair while the other held you securely against him. Meanwhile, your hands rested comfortably on his broad shoulders, delighting in the sensation of his lips guiding yours in a series of tender, warm kisses.

However, you were the first to pull away, knowing that this moment sadly couldn’t last forever. The night was already growing late, and a nagging voice in the back of your mind warned you to be more careful. 

“As much as I’d love to keep going, we’re going to get penalized for missing curfew again,” you mumbled, lightly squeezing his hand.

Jeno frowned, clearly displeased about the abrupt end to the kiss. But he knew you were right. For some reason, your RA was super strict about everyone being in their dorm rooms by 10 p.m.

With a sigh of resignation, he nodded reluctantly and allowed you to start walking again. But Jeno couldn’t be upset for long, knowing he’d have plenty more opportunities to feel your soft, pillowy lips against his. He was a little clingy when it came to you, and thankfully you didn’t seem to mind.

Though Jeno felt pretty miserable earlier in the semester, now he couldn’t be happier to be alive. With Jisung still as his best friend and now having you by his side, he felt like he could accomplish anything.

Being in love had that sort of effect on people, Jeno supposed. And he had a feeling you would agree with him on that too.

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

previous masterlist -> current masterlist

[romanstheory]

Midnight Flowers a Damian Priest One Shot

Warnings: language, smut, public sex, drinking

Word count: 1,630

Inspired By: Midnight Sky & Flowers by Miley Cyrus

The music in this club vibrates through me, I can feel it in my bones. The intoxicating boom on the base through this place always leaves me wanting more. My skin tight black dress leaves very little to the imagination as my hips sway to the beat of the music. Eyes closed, head back, enchanted. I've been single now for a month, and damn it's been the best month of my life. No begging for attention, no worrying about if he's sleeping around, no crying myself to sleep. I broke things off with Luis... Damian last time he was home from being on the road a month ago. I spent 4 years shackled to him just trying to hold on to see if it would get better.

Stupid is what I was because it never did get any better. The beginning was like magic, something you read about in a book but then he got a push from WWE and it felt like he himself had changed. He had tunnel vision on what he wanted and I became an afterthought. But none of that matters anymore, i can be free by myself. No him, no WWE, no crying myself to sleep or wondering if I'm enough. Because I am more than enough, I always was. I buy myself the flowers he wouldn't, take myself on the dates he thought were stupid, watch the shows he ignored.

He was the perfect partner until he.... Wasn't and I realized that I deserved more, I DESERVE more. So I ended it and I walked away before he could respond or I could take back what I had just done. I walked away and I never looked back. I cried myself to sleep that night, my body ached in every way possible, my heart shattered. "It's for your own good" I told myself over and over again until I believed it. Now I believe it as I dance in this club freely belonging to no one. The song switches which is the only reason I break from the trance the music hold over me. Slowly I open my eyes before going to the bar for one more drink. "I'll take a lemon drop and my tab!" I say sweetly to the bartender, he gives me a nod in return.

I hear people around me gasping and talking amongst each other, but I choose to scroll on my phone and sip my sweetly bitter drink. Someone sits next to me, again I choose to ignore it, probably just a sloppy drunk man ready to shoot his shot. Though I wouldn't blame him I am painfully uninterested in entertaining anyone tonight least of all a sloppy drunk man I'll have to baby and care for. "I'll just take whatever beer you have on draft" A deep voice rumbles next to me. Is it... no, it couldn't be right? It's been a month since I've seen him, surely this isn't a random pit stop. "You look good" The voice rumbles again. I peek out of the corner of my eye, refusing to face him, and of course there he is in all of his asshole glory.... Damian Priest.

"I know" I reply cooly before taking a big sip of my drink. He chuckles before shaking his head "Nice to see you too". I roll my eyes before gulping down the rest of my drink, I'm about to need it. "You never told me why you broke up with me" Damian says before drinking deeply from his glass "You just kind of dipped out". Anger burns deep within me before my head finally snaps over to him. Beautiful, he's so fucking beautiful I hate it. His hair is slicked back in a bun, his beard freshly trimmed, and he smells masculine with some hints of floral nodes. "I didn't think I needed to, my reasons seemed pretty in your face".

"Why are you here?" My voice dry and monotone "I was having a great time until you got here". His eyes catch my breasts before moving down to the rest of my body, and back up again to my face. Chugging his beer until the glass is empty he holds my stare again "I had some extra time, thought I could find you here so I came". Damian's mouth opens before closing again as if he's trying to figure out the words he wants to say "Can we go on a walk?". I stare at him for a long moment before replying "Pay for my tab and I'll walk". A nod is Damian's response before paying for both of our drinks. My head sings with the sweet buzz of alcohol, enough to make me okay with this stupid ass walk I'm about to go on.

The summer air brushes against my exposed skin as we begin our walk. Our stupid ass walk. "So?" I ask, refusing to look him in his stupid beautiful face. "So..." He replies. Oh fuck me... Here we go with this again. "Why are you here anyway? Why choose tonight to ruin my night?" Anger laced with sadness fills my gut. Sharply exhaled through his nose "I just... wanted to see you is that okay? Does it even matter?". Abruptly I stop walking "Yeah it fucking matters! I haven't seen you since I broke up with you Luis" My voice amplifies with every word. "Damn wanna be a little louder? I don't think they can hear you down the block" Damian's jaw twitches with what I assume is embarrassment.

"Why didn't you fight for me? Was I just not worth fighting for?" The words pour out of my mouth before I can stop them. "Was our relationship not worth fighting for?". Truthfully, by the time I ended things there was not relationship left to fight for. But that didn't stop me from wanting him to say... something... anything. "You were always worth fighting for. I just didn't see it until you were already gone" His hands lay loose at his side like he's awaiting defeat. "I know" My voice is just above a whisper because that's the only way my lips will allow it to escape. "I know I was always worth fighting for but you convinced me I hadn't been... And now I know I don't need you to be loved".

His head hangs in defeat for only a breath before his long legs close the distance between us, before he pulls me into an alley. "Luis what the fu-" His lips meet mine before I can finish. Melting, I'm fucking melting into the kiss. Oh I hate him but my body aches for him, leaning deeper into the kiss. "I know you don't need me, I'm glad you don't but I need you... Right now I need you" His voice is so deep it rumbles like thunder against my lips. "If you won't accept my apology then let me fuck you so you know I mean it". My body sings with excitement. He may have not been a good boyfriend, but he fucks like his life depends on it, and I am more than willing to allow it even in this alley.

"You better fuck me good, and fast before somebody sees us" I purr into his ear. That was all he needed, he was pulling at his belt and lifting my dress before I could take my next breath. Sliding my panties to the side he pushes his thick hard member against my entrance. Damian plants soft bites along my jaw and neck forcing soft moans out of my mouth. Damian grips my my thighs, putting my back against the cold brick wall before pushing into me with one stroke. A yelp escapes me "Shhh mami don't get the fun cut short" He purrs into my neck

My legs tighten around his waist as I bite my bottom lip to keep another moan from escaping me. Over and over again he pushes his long thick length into me, massaging every inch of me. "I missed this, missed you" He purrs again "Nobody feels like you, mami" His accent sends my head spinning, his grip on my thighs tighten, fingers digging in so rough I'm sure it'll leave a mark. "Nobody fucks me like you" I whisper, the words seems to be ammunition for him because he pounds into me harder, faster, deeper. I squeal again "Mami tranquila, you'll ruin the fun" A devilish grin spreads across his stupid face.

He sucks on my neck, leaving red marks behind, is he trying to make his territory? Do I care? Does anyone else? My climax is imminent, but I don't want it to end. I rock my hips back and forth edging myself on, our hips colliding over and over again. A low grumble escapes him before he throws his head back. "Fuck" He groans low. Over and over I rock my hips into him, massaging my sensitive space. Warmth fills me before my body is in pure ecstasy. Light flashes and my vision blurs before he pushes into me deeply, growling like some sort of wild animal, releasing his load deeply into me. Quickly he puts my down and we fix ourselves still panting like wild animals. He looks at me, those once lust-filled eyes now coated with thick sorrow and longing. "I really am sorry" He says after a long pause. "I know" I say before walking away, leaving him in the alley alone. I don't belong to anyone not even Damian Priest... Luis... whatever the fuck he wants to be called. I fix my hair as I walk down the sidewalk, a smirk smeared across my face. Damn, that felt good.

[captainsophiestark]

Vigilante Book Club Part 2

Jason Todd x Reader

Masterlist - Join My Taglist! - Part 1 Part 3

Written for my personal fic writing challenge for 2024, Sophie's Year of Fic! Featuring a new fic being posted every Friday, all year long :)

Fandom: DC

Summary: After having an all-around terrible day, the only person who might be able to make it better is a certain book-loving vigilante.

Word Count: 1,562

Category: Fluff

A/N: This is the closest I've come all year to missing a Friday lol, but we got it done! Woohoo!

Putting work into an AI program without permission is illegal. You do not have my permission. Do not do it.

****************

I hummed to myself as I moved around the kitchen, dancing to the music I had on in the background while making sure everything cooked just right. I had a reputation to fix, after all, and I was determined to get it right.

After the Red Hood had broken into my apartment to return my favorite book last week, I'd convinced him to come back for a thank-you dinner and to talk about the book, which he'd been planning to read in the meantime. He'd also vaguely insulted my cooking, although I'd mostly forgiven him for that in light of him returning my book.

Tonight was the date we'd set for dinner and book-talk, and I'd spent the week preparing the perfect recipe. Even better, the kitchen currently smelled amazing, which had to be a good sign of success.

Right on cue, about the same time he'd shown up last week, I heard a knock on my door. I smiled, trying to ignore the way my heart sped up a little as I quickly wiped my hands on the kitchen towel and headed for the door.

I paused just long enough to look through the peep hole and, as expected, the Red Hood stood towering in my doorway. This time, instead of the whole-head helmet, he only had a red domino mask on. Thank goodness, since the dinner part of this whole evening would be ruined if he couldn't actually eat without revealing his secret identity. I swung open the door with a grin.

"Hi! I'm glad you came! Honestly, I was half expecting you to be at the window again."

He just grunted and shrugged.

"I wasn't sure you'd actually be home, or still up for this. Figured I'd come to the door and give you a chance to pretend not to be home."

"Don't be ridiculous," I said, waving off his concerns as I opened the door wide. "I've been looking forward to this all week. Unless, of course, you're here to hate on my favorite book. If that's the case, I think I'm going to have to throw you out."

He laughed. "Don't worry, I'd never do that. I know what a true favorite book means to a reader."

I gave him a little smile and a nod as I closed the front door, then headed past him into the kitchen. I gestured to the bar stools at my counter as I checked that everything still looked good.

"Have a seat. Can I get you anything to drink?"

"A water would be great."

"Sure thing! Coming right up." I filled up a glass for Red Hood and myself, then fixed him with a smile as I set his glass down in front of him. "So... notice anything different from the last time you were here? Anything in the kitchen, maybe?"

He hummed, pausing and pretending to think. I put my hands on my hips and raised an eyebrow, and after a moment, he broke and grinned.

"I'll admit, the kitchen's looking much more promising than the last time you said you were making dinner in here."

"Thank you," I said, smiling as I turned around to start plating everything. "I told you, last time you were here was just a record-breaking bad day. A cooking fluke."

I could hear him hum behind me, at least pretending not to sound totally convinced.

"Next time, I'll make something. Everything you've got going right now looks amazing, but I'm a pretty good cook myself. I wouldn't want you thinking I'm acting like a critic out of nowhere."

I hesitated a second before turning around, trying to get my ridiculous smile and racing heart under control. I technically didn't know him very well yet, but so far, I'd started to really like Red Hood. I loved the idea of making this a regular thing, and I loved even more that he'd suggested it. I took a deep breath, then finally turned around, my smile still massive but at least a little more reasonable.

"Deal. Next time, you cook."

****************

I laughed, closing my book and shaking my head as I looked up at Hoodie. He looked back over the top of his own book, one eyebrow raised.

"What?" he asked, leaning slightly towards me. I shook my head, smiling all the same.

"Nothing. I just know why you wanted me to read this book so badly now."

"Oh yeah? And why's that?"

I cleared my throat dramatically and lifted Hoodie's copy of Northanger Abbey, which he'd temporarily loaned me, before starting to read:

"The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid."

Hoodie grinned. "I'll admit, I may have levelled that quote at a family member or two. Although, I might widen the original to include stories in general."

I snorted. "And if one of those family members said they loved podcasts or movies or something, but not books?"

"No, they're the exception. They're idiots whether or not they enjoy a good story."

I laughed, and after a moment, Hoodie joined me. Since that first reading date, we'd made our unofficial vigilante book club into a weekly occurance. He always came over to my place, and we spent the evening talking about books, or reading together and then talking about books. We alternated who cooked, and this time, it was his responsibility. He had food cooking in the crock-pot, and the delicious smells had been temping me for the better part of the past few hours.

"So I take it you're enjoying the book?" he asked, laying his down in his lap. I nodded, mirroring his gesture and sitting up a little straighter.

"I am. I can't believe it took me so long to get around to reading it! I've loved all the other Austen I've read."

"Which is why we get along," he said with a grin. I nodded.

"I could never spend time like this with a man who didn't at least appreciate Pride and Prejudice."

"Of course not."

"But what about you? Are you liking your book of the week?"

He nodded, scooting a little closer to me on the couch.

"I've said it before and I'll say it again, you have good taste in books. I don't think you've picked one yet that I haven't liked."

"...Now I sort of want to take that as a challenge."

Hoodie just rolled his eyes.

"Be careful. I've read some shit I wouldn't wish on anyone, but I can and will use it as payback if I have to."

I laughed. "I don't know, I've read some pretty unbeatably bad ones..."

"Oh yeah? Well how about-"

He stopped short at the sound of a ringtone. I raised an eyebrow as he grimaced. Not once, in all the weeks we'd been doing this, had either of us let a phone interrupt the night.

"Sorry. Vigilante phone," he grunted. "Just a second."

I waved him off to let him know it was no problem, and he shot me a quick smile before answering. To my surprise, he held it out in front of him and put it on speaker.

"What do you want?" he barked without a hello. "I'm busy."

"Yeah, so busy that nobody's been able to get a hold of you all night!" came an exasperated voice that sounded much too young for that level of exhaustion. "We started prepping for Alfred's birthday-"

BOOM! A loud noise that sounded too close to an explosion for comfort cut off the rest of the sentence. My jaw dropped open at the same time that the kid on the other end of the phone shouted out at the top of his lungs.

"JASON! What happened? Are you- oh shit, I think that was on my end." A brief pause, some scuffling, and the sound of an alarm in the background as Hoodie—as Jason—and I sat frozen in place on the couch. "Just get back here as soon as you can to help!"

The kid on the other end hung up, leaving Jason and I in the ringing silence of my apartment. After a moment, the man on the couch next to me sighed heavily, and I decided to beat him to the punch on further breaking the silence.

"I am... so sorry," I said. "I know you probably didn't want that, like, getting out, and-"

"Stop," he said gently, reaching out to take my hands in his. I did, opting instead to chew on the inside of my lip as I looked at him with wide eyes. "Look, it's not exactly how I wanted this to go, and I wasn't expecting Timbo to use the vigilante phone to say my civilian name, but... I've been thinking about telling you for a while. I'm not upset that you know, and I've know you long enough now that I trust you to keep my secret."

My mouth dropped open a little as a thousand butterflies exploded in my chest. This was a major leap of faith and trust in the relationship we'd been building in our little book club. I squeezed Jason's hands, smiling as I leaned into him a little. He grinned back at me, then sighed.

"Now, if you hated Austen, maybe I'd have to be a little more worried about all this..."

I gasped. "I could never."

"Exactly. You're not somebody I'm worried about here."

We shared another, softer smile, and then I reluctantly dropped Jason's hands.

"Speaking of people you should be worried about... whoever made that call sounded like they could use your help."

Jason's eyes rolled back so far I couldn't see the pupils anymore.

"They're idiots who should never be allowed anywhere near a kitchen, but they'll survive without me for a little longer. At least long enough to do this."

For a split second, I expected him to lean in for a kiss, and my heart did a backflip in my chest. Instead, he reached up for the domino mask still sitting comfortably on his face, which somehow seemed more intimate.

Slowly, he pulled away the fabric, revealing the bright blue eyes it had been hiding. When he smiled, this time I could see the corners of his eyes turning up along with his mouth, and even from a few feet away I could see his gorgeous eyelashes. It took some actual effort not to swoon, even though his face didn't change significantly from when he'd been wearing the mask.

"Like what you see?" he asked, tone soft but joking. I huffed a laugh and let a smile make its way back onto my face.

"Yeah. I do."

"Good. Then... what do you think about going out? On a real date, with me, not Red Hood? No pressure if you're not interested, but-"

"I would love that," I said, my smile morphing to take up my entire face. "Jason."

He beamed back at me the second his name left my lips, the two of us gravitating towards each other until his vigilante phone started blaring again and Jason rolled his eyes.

"I better go. But I'll see you... this Friday? Pick you up at six?"

I nodded. "It's a date."

Jason grinned, his eyes darting back to me every few seconds as he collected his things. We agreed to just keep each other's books until Friday since we wouldn't get to finish reading them together tonight, making Jason the first person I'd ever trusted with my only copy of a book. Our goodbye took longer than it should've since he had explosions to deal with and we were seeing each other again in a few days, but neither of us could bear to part any faster. And when the front door finally shut, it was hours before I actually wiped the smile off my face.

Who could've guessed something positive would come out of one of my most obnoxious bad days to date, let alone someone as wonderful as Jason?

****************

Everything Taglist: @rosecentury @kmc1989 @space-helen

DC Taglist: @gaychaosgremlin @v1ckycheesue

[make-friends-with-the-rats]

Newsies Interview with Christian Bale for Seventeen Magazine, 1992

(transcript under the cut)

---

Cristian Bale lumbers into a conference room on a rainy Saturday morning. He plops down in a chair, yawns, and wipes sleep from his eyes. Dressed in black jeans, a sweatshirt, and sneakers, he apologizes for being late. "I'm just getting over the flu and I'm still jet-lagged," he explains, "so I'm moving a little slowly."

But the six-foot-two British-born actor, best known for his film debut as a young schoolboy in Steven Spielberg's epic Empire of the Sun and more recently for Kenneth Branagh's Henry V, need not apologize. For the past few weeks, he's been flying round and round from L.A. to London to Prague and back again.

"I've been doing reshoots for Newsies here, doing preproduction work on a new film, Swing Kids, in Prague, and visiting my mom, sister, and girlfriend in England. And I don't even like to fly!" he says with a slight shudder. "Before I came here, I flew on a plane that sounded like it had a window open the whole time."

When Bale heard about Newsies, a live-action musical recounting the tale of the New York newsboys' strike of 1899, he claims he had no interest in auditioning for the project. "I'd never sung or danced, and I didn't think I could do a musical," he says. "I read for the film in England, and then Disney flew me to Los Angeles for a screen test. But before I signed the contract, I meet with the director [Kenny Ortega] and told him I wasn't comfortable with the dancing and singing and I didn't want to be a bloody Artful Dodger in a remake of Oliver!, jumping down the street with a big smile on my face. But he told me it wouldn't be like that, and then he lied to me about all of these different actors who had done musicals, like Al Pacino."

After he was cast as Jack Kelly, the head Newsie, Bale joined the rest of the films actors and dancers in two months of "Newsies school." He studied singing, dancing, speaking with a Brooklyn accent (circa 1899), gymnastics, and karate. "We had a kung fu master," he recalls with a laugh. "Thirty of us would be standing in a room doing something like t'ai chi to this humming music. It's very relaxing, but when you see yourself in a mirror, it's really funny.

"Filming Newsies was a blast," he says. "By the time the cameras started rolling, we were so prepared we were ready for anything. The blend of technically great dancers and actors with great characterizations made it all work perfectly." And what about his Oliver! fear? "Sure, we're singing and dancing in the streets," he says, "but we don't always have smiles on our faces."

Immediately upon finishing Newsies, Bale flew up to Prague to begin Swing Kids, which costars Robert Sean Leonard and Frank Whaley. "It's set in 1930s Hamburg, Germany," the eighteen-year-old explains. "There was quite a big culture then among teenagers who liked to dress in zoot suits and go to swing clubs. The story is about three friends from different backgrounds who love swing music. I play the bad seed."

In between movies, Bale tries to squeeze in time with his family and girlfriend. "I've been going with the same girl for three years," he says shyly. "But she's going to a university in England and I'm relocating to Los Angeles, where my father lives. If I had nothing to do with the film industry, I'd stay in England, but Bournemouth [the city where he's lived for the past five years] isn't exactly the film capital of the world."

If he never made another movie, however, Bale says he wouldn't mind a noncelebrity life. "I love making movies," he concludes, "but I also love my privacy. If it all ended tomorrow, I'd just live by the sea and be perfectly happy."

[thesoleilla]

Hello I am very fond of your writing style lately and wanted to drop a request :) I would really like if you do one this in Gojo or Dazai

Going on shopping with them

Writing their name on their palm

slow dancing

souvenir from travels

Please I will really appreciate if you did any two of them or just club them all in one up to you how you do them. Hope you have a great day <333

Souvenir from a trip | Dazai x Reader

Masterlist

As a member of a detective agency, Dazai often had to travel around Japan which meant, he was away a lot, leaving you alone, in an empty miserable apartment.

Everytime he came back, your home filled up with life again. Sure, he made a mess, but that was what made this damn apartment feel like home. It felt as if he never left. And he himself acted like he never left. Never once did he say he missed you, or even told you about what he did. He never even asked what you did, which hurt the most. He simply didn't seem to care. Perhaps he did, maybe he didn't. You thought dating him would help uncover all of the mysteries, turns out he just created others. He probably did care, you knew it, but never getting that simple confirmation made you ache. You weren't asking for much, just wanted to be sure he missed you, and that life was harder without you.

As a result of this behaviour, here you were, sitting on the couch of your empty apartment, among the many candy wrappers and papers, mindlessly watching the tv, or more like zoning out to the TV. If someone asked, you wouldn't even be able to tell them what you were watching. But it brought a bit of light to your eyes, action to this place, the only bit of life you could get.

You just craved life, and seeing other humans interacting on your stream made it feel slightly more real.

That was, until you heard the tingling sound of keys unlocking the door. Right, today was the day he was supposed to come back - somehow, you managed to forget that piece of information. Maybe you just... didn't care anymore. Usually, you'd be rushing towards the door to greet him excitedly, but you simply couldn't find the strength for that right now. It just happened too many times. You knew he wouldn't reciprocate your excitement, why even try? And so, you just kept sitting on that damn couch, occasionally sneaking a pic at the door being opened.

"Y/NNNN!!! Oh, how I've missed you!!!" ... Huh? Dazai was now rushing towards you, a big bag in his hands, which he carefully put down on the table before purposefully falling down on top of you, hugging you tight.

"...What are you doing?"

"What? Am I not allowed to miss my sweet, dearest Y/N?!" He faked his shock dramatically, which would usually make you cheer up and forget everything. Unfortunately, today wasn't usual.

"...Why now, out of nowhere?"

"Because I, Dazai Osamu, the greatest boyfriend ever, got back my souvenirs!" He kept up his dramatic theatrical tone, which started working on you.

"Got back...? 'samu, you better explain yourself."

"Open the bag, and you'll find the answer your heart desires!" He said, almost forcing the bag into your hands, and, oh Lord was it heavy.

You eventually started looking inside, finding a souvenir from every place he has been too in the past few years. Mugs, badges, keychains, patches... You name it, he had it.

"Why not give me this before..?"

Dazai rolled his eyes "Alas, you should refer to the very evil coworker Kunikkida who kept taking them from me and said I could only have them back when I was done with my work!"

You rolled your eyes as well, sighing and chuckling before burying your face into his chest.

"You're an idiot sometimes. I was scared, dumbass... Why did you never tell me you missed me though?"

Dazai pushed up imaginary glasses onto his nose with a slug grin. "Well, that would be meaningless without a gift wouldn't it?"

You chuckled at his antics, squeezing him tighter.

"Well, don't do that again. You scared the crap out of me.."

"Okay, I promise." He let go of his over the top tone, almost whispering as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.

Heyyy! Heavily apologize for the very late response, as always, I'm still catching up on requests and just don't have a lot of times to dedicate to writing. Hope you enjoyed this, you all take care and have a great day!

After today, you found yourself with an healthier relationship, and a whole lot of mugs.

[fictionfromthevoid]

Bucky Barnes x ex-red-room-agent! reader headcanons:

A/N: Some of my thoughts about how it would be like if Bucky dated an ex-red-room agent because I think it would really fit. I might write a part 2 that plays during the events of The Falcon and The Winter Soldier when I have rewatched the show. Because it's been a while since I've last seen it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

like Natasha you grew up in the red room as part of the black widow program

after a failed mission you got captured by SHIELD, Natasha convinced you to join SHIELD

you meet Bucky a few months before the beginning of the events of The Falcon and the Winter soldier

You meet when you both run to help some kids who where being robbed by a gang or something like that

You both are intrigued by each other's combat skills, both asking each other about it and receiving the same answer "long story I'd rather not tell"

You invited him for a drink at a nearby bar that night and you two had a great time talking and laughing and silently agreeing to not ask about each other's past. At the end of the evening, you exchange numbers

You are the one to ask him out first. Which is fortunate, because he wouldn't have done it. Even tho he liked you he was still too insecure and felt like he didn't deserve something like romance at the moment.

You had not much experience with dates that weren't set up for a spying mission or an assassination, so you two simply got drinks at the same bar again.

After that, he took you on a lot of old-school 40s-like dates.

Walks in the park, 'going dancing' where he realised that clubs are vastly different now than what he remembered

when you were out one evening it started raining horribly and since you were close to Bucky's flat you two sought shelter from the weather there.

He made the both of you tea and you sat on the floor (he didn't have much furniture) and spent the night talking. That's the first time you tell each other about your past.

You realise that you have a lot in common.

You both are so happy to finally have found someone who understands again.

He lost Steve, you lost Natasha - you both lost the only people who could understand your life

You spend the whole night talking until you both fall asleep on his living room floor.

This is also the first time you see him having a nightmare.

You talk it out and comfort him. He falls asleep again in your arms.

Not long after that, you make your relationship official

He asks you, all 40s style, with flowers and all, to be his girlfriend. You think it's incredibly cute but also incredibly funny and you might laugh at him a little

when his past is haunting him, or when he has had an especially bad nightmare he calls you. You either come over and comfort him or you talk it out over the phone.

You teach him about your culture and introduce him to the Russian community in New York, where you live.Even though your childhood in the red room was traumatic, you are still Russian, and you still think your culture is beautiful, regardless of the government.

When you find out that he speaks Russian you are thrilled

Because speaking to the person you love in your native language is just a lot more intimate. English will never touch your heart as much as your mother tongue does.

You start speaking in Russian more often. Soon you two mix the languages

He will ask something in English, you answer in Russian or you start a sentence in English and finish it in Russian

When other people hear you speak they are always VERY confused

But you two think it's amazing that you can communicate in both your native languages

You are the one who convinces Bucky to go to therapy

In the beginning, you accompany him to the sessions since he doesn't feel comfortable talking to anyone but you about his problems

But slowly he trusts his therapist more and more until he eventually doesn't need you there anymore

You still often drive him there and pick him up, since a therapy session can sometimes leave you feeling pretty shattered

[puhpandas]

Coolsville

(1,413 words)

At a Halloween party during college, Evan's friends ask him a question that gets him thinking. 🎃🕷🍫👻

Evan hadnt expected to enjoy the party. College parties in the movies were always so loud and rowdy, and everyone would always be drinking and being obnoxious and-- its almost like a buffet table of everything Evan doesn't like.

He almost hadnt even gone, but of course, Gregory had somehow wrangled him into going, even without him there by his side, having to stay home to finish his comic page before his deadline. "Come on, Evan, you have to take risks every once in a while. What's the worst that could happen?"

And Evan had truly tried his best to find the answer to that question on the way there. His friends from college, people he met in classes and activities around campus who invited him, were the ones to pick him up.

But it somehow didnt cross his mind that these are his friends, and they-- they know how he is, and they're good friends, so maybe the party wouldn't be as bad as in the movies.

It ended up not being, when he finally arrived and there werent even that many people. The music hadnt shaken the walls or hurt his ears, the place was covered head to toe in halloween decorations, jelly window clings on every glass surface, streamers and balloons and ghost and gravestone shaped cookies layed out, tropical punch food-colored radioactive green on the counters.

It hadnt been like the movies, which are like Evans worst nightmare-- it was fun.

He'd danced badly with his friends, the number of attendants small and not overwhelming. The music turned from techno to spooky quickly, as soon as people in costume started showing up. Evan himself is starting to run out of ideas (so many Halloween's going all out with Gregory is making his internal costume bank run on empty), so he'd had to settle on one half of his homemade duo costume with Gregory; two beanie baby bears, The Beginning and The End.

Any tightness he'd felt in his chest dreading every second he got closer to arriving at the party slowly but surely ebbed as time went on. He munched on the sweet treats, colored frosting turning his tongue orange, and talked with his friends. Norman, who he met joining a birdwatching club, talked about some drama with his ex-girlfriend back in high school, and Kenny, who he met simply after being partnered with him in a group assignment, told an elaborate story about when his dog went missing as a kid and how they brought her home.

Any uncomfortable-ness that could have lingered is nowhere to be seen by the time everything's said and done. Evan's shocked to see the time at 11:28pm when he'd arrived at six, so he shoots Gregory a quick text letting him know he'll be late home.

After reading Gregorys enthusiastic response, Evan heads back into the living room, where the TV is playing some cartoon on mute, Lo-Fi Halloween music is playing softly on the speakers, and everyone except Evan and his friends has cleared out. The cookie plates are empty, the punch bowl almost drained, and Evan's face hurts from how much hes been smiling all evening.

After he settles on the couch, they all get to talking again, Evan seamlessly re-entering the conversation feeling like he never left. He doesnt feel like a burden here, not like he did with his 'friends' in high school. He laughs boisterously as Kenny recounts an inside joke.

At some point, everyone tired and their batteries draining, they switch the topic to something that's just as childish as Evan likes it; Twenty Questions.

The questions are tame at first, like favorite foods and colors, but they get more personal and in depth as time goes on. They ask about first crushes, most embarrassing moments and history with friends.

One question gets Evan to pause, though.

"Okay, okay," Joshua, whos-- great, really, super great and awesome, starts after the giggling dies down enough to get any words out. "I've got one. Let's say you walk into a room, and everyone you've ever known is there-- who are you going to find first?"

Evan blinks, not even having to think. They go around the circle, like they have this whole time, until they reach him. "What about you, Evan?" Joshua asks.

"My brother." His mouth says so quickly he almost surprises himself.

"Really?" Joshua asks, smiling. He's met Gregory before and they got along great. "Why him, out of everyone?"

He only takes a second to respond, but he doesnt think anything he saying has any thought behind it. The words are already in his mouth, so sure when they spill out.

"Who else," Evan says. "if not him?"

Everyone seems to take that as answer enough, Joshua nodding before revealing his own answer. It's like background noise to Evan, who's still staring at the same crumb-riddled Frankenstein shaped paper plate that's been sitting on the coffee table this whole time.

Who else, if not him? Evan doesn't think theres one person in this world he would choose over Gregory. Not Cassidy, no matter how much he loves her, not Cassie, not his family, and certainly none of his blood family.

He tries to think of a scenario where he does. He can't.

It always circles back to Gregory, who found him almost ten years ago now and changed everything. Gregory, who is the sole reason hes here today. Gregory, who did more for him than anyone else. Gregory, who he cant imagine living without, who he wouldnt want to. Gregory, who's always been there for him. Gregory, who caused Evan to become the person he is today.

Gregory, whos the only reason Evan came to this party, met people he believes are real, true friends, had fun on his own, took a risk.

He took a risk over a year ago, when he ditched his family and hightailed it to the Fazbears when he was eighteen. He took a risk when Gregory convinced him he was capable of college, when theyd made plans when they were so young that college felt infinitely far away to Evan. He took a risk when he mumbled his name to Gregory that day, the chance of getting it spat back in his face a real possibility.

Who else, if not him? Evan cant think of a single one.

He gets the sudden urge to text Gregory, and the moment he sets a hand on his phone, it vibrates with a new text message.

Gregory: if u dont come home soon im gonna be asleep when u get here lol

"Evan?" Joshua asks suddenly. Evan jolts, glancing up to look at him. The chatter has stopped, and Josh is staring at him in a way where Evan can tell it's not the first look he's sent. "Are you okay?"

A smile creeps up on Evan's face, wobbly but enough to make his cheeks hurt. "Yeah," He says, rubbing at his thankfully dry eyes. "I just-- think I'm gonna head home soon, yknow?"

Joshua smiles ever so slightly. "Yeah."

Norman and Kenny start awwing, and it makes Evan smile even wider. Joshua grabs his keys after they're done hugging Evan, and they head outside and get in his car together.

Its quiet when they start driving, and Evan sends a text to Gregory before looking at Joshua. "I'm sorry if it seemed like I wanted to leave at the end, there..." He feels the need to say. "I just-- got to thinking."

"About what?" Josh asks.

Evan smiles instinctively. "My brother."

Joshua chuckles, shifting to just one hand on the steering wheel. "I get it. Yknow my parents had another kid when I was like, twelve?"

Evan's eyes widen. "Wow, really?"

"Yeah." Joshua says. "They were worried we wouldn't get along, but... even if it was hard at first, we got close." Evan looks at him from the passenger seat, and the smile on Josh's face is all genuine, pure love.

"Hes nine now." He says. "I think... I think nowadays, I'd do anything for him."

Evan smiles, it's a small, soft smile, and he thinks back to a twelve year old Gregory, a lightning bolt of a kid who struck Evan very suddenly and swept him up in a way he'd never forget.

"Yeah," Evan almost whispers, turning on his phone and looking at the photo of him and Gregory when they were fifteen as his lockscreen. "me too."

ao3

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.101 Cash money

I took Kooper for a nice long walk, which was something we didn't do often. He was chill and required less physical activity than Rosie, so I always favored her when I wanted company on my jogs. Even though he could have gone without, he appreciated the time together and smiled the entire time. When we got home, Sophia was standing at the door giving me that look. I unleashed Kooper as quickly as I could and whisked her away into our love den. Being on vacation in a fancy house was cool and all, but nothing compared to our own bed. I think we were trying to show it how much we missed it and lingered there until our stomachs growled around dinnertime. Afterward, we attempted to settle on the couch in the office, but we were intercepted by a huge pile of presents. I forgot that was a thing sims did at weddings. Sophia was overjoyed at the sight; it felt like Winterfest all over again.

I let her open the first two from my parents, but then she handed me a box that had my name on it. I thought it was odd that the sender would single me out when the gift should have been for both of us. But when I saw who it was from, I understood.

"It's from Dub! Oh, there's a card..."

[click to enlarge]

I couldn't believe it and had to sit down and read it again. He had no idea how much of a blessing that was for us. Or maybe he did. Whatever the case, I was elated, and humbled, and determined, and proud, and all the other positive emotions. Our friendship was such a beautiful thing. Not because he gave me money, but because it was pure. It had no conditions or warnings or complications. He was the kind of friend I always wanted.

Eventually, it hit me that Sophia and I were about to come into a bunch of money and we could accomplish our dreams a lot sooner than later. I started dancing in my seat.

"A money tree? I didn't think they were real," Sophia said.

"Isn't it great?? If it grows fast enough, we could be in our house by next week!"

That thought excited me even more, and I danced even wilder.

"It's a very generous gift," she said hesitantly, "but..."

Like a record scratch in the club, I stopped. Party done.

"What's wrong? With all the money we're about to have, you'll never have to work again if you don't want to. We can go on vacations and stay as long as we want, buy our kids whatever they want... Hell, maybe I won't have to worry about teaching classes anymore. It's gonna be great!"

Her hands snapped to her hips, and I knew I'd messed up somehow.

"No, Luca! This is what I mean! I like who we are. Money has a way of changing sims, and I don't want that. I thought you taught yoga because you were passionate about it. Why would you stop? Are you doing it for the money?"

"I am passionate about it! But it's also how I make a living. If I didn't have to worry about making money, maybe I wouldn't have to worry about going from spa to spa, begging for a chance to teach!"

Her eyes flicked open, like she just realized something.

"But that's why you're going to open a studio."

"Yeah, but..." I sank back in the chair and let out all the air in my lungs. "That was my mom's idea. It's a good one, and sometimes I want to do it too. But sometimes I want my own plan. Everything I've done has been her idea, and..."

"So...you don't want a studio?"

"I don't know!"

She gasped.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. It's just...it's complicated. You want me to return the seed, then?"

She sighed.

"No. That will be an insult to Dub and his family..." She sighed again and paced the room, searching for a solution that would satisfy us both. "It would be nice to move into our house before the baby comes, but I don't want this to get out of control."

Something like a bolt of lightning struck through my soul, and I felt my eyes grow as large as the sun.

"The baby?! Are you-"

She gasped again.

"I'm sorry! That came out wrong! I just meant it would be nice to be settled in our home before we start having babies."

"So...we're not having a baby?"

"Not at the moment."

I was a little bit disappointed, to be honest. Her slip up shocked me at first, but I was kind of excited about it.

"Alright, so what do you suggest we do?" I asked.

"I just think we need a plan. Put some controls on it so we don't go crazy."

Heh, I know she said we, but she totally meant me. Whatever.

"We don't know how much money it's going to give us," she continued. "So what if we just take what we need to get our house and cover ourselves for a few months?"

"Alright... But what happens after that?"

"It can just sit there until an emergency comes up. Or when our kids want to move out or go to university or get married or...whatever."

The plan wasn't exactly what I wanted, but at least she wasn't completely opposed. This very much felt like one of those pick your battles moments, so I conceded.

"Okay fine. We can do it that way. Let's get this thing in the ground."

We went outside and picked a spot to plant it. I laughed when I took the seed out of the box.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"This seed! It's cash shaped like a flower! What kind of wizardry is this?"

I dug a hole, dumped the seed, covered it, and poured some water on it. Then, I stood over it, watching as if something were supposed to happen.

"Grow fast, little guy. I want to be in our new house as soon as possible."

Before going back into the house, I sent Dub a message to thank him for the gift.

Dub's note written by @mysimsloveaffair

[x-stephanie-sinnz-x]

For my husband's birthday, I told him I loved him while a stranger came in my pussy

Someone suggested I try writing about a more recent slutty experience, and well, nothing is more recent than my husband's birthday night about two weeks ago.

It's worth noting up front-- I have total freedom in my marriage to sleep with whom I choose, and from time to time I exercise that freedom.  However, I've never done it in front of my husband, for no other reason than's always said he prefers knowing I could always be out there, getting my pussy filled with a stranger's cum. But for reasons that don't matter here, he told me he wanted to watch me pick someone up and fuck them as a birthday present. I was beyond thrilled-- I love being his slutwife, and I've ALWAYS wanted to show him how much of a slutwife I can be.

We already had a hotel room booked in the city, and I told him the best chance was to head out to a club. I put on a very short red mini dress with nothing underneath, and we headed out. Once there, I told him that while he was going to watch later, it would be easier for me to find someone by myself.  So I had him sit tight at one of the bars, and headed off on my own for a bit.

It didn't take long before  a group of guys picked me up. We started flirting, I told them what was on the menu for the evening. A few of them were interested, and after some dancing, making out, and light petting, I picked the one with the largest bulge. My husband's cock is well above average in length and girth, and I wanted him to watch his slutwife with someone at least his size. I took him back to my husband, and we left to go back to the room. My husband went a bit ahead of us, giving us time to get to know each other one the short walk back.

Each step back to the hotel room got me more excited and wetter. By the time we arrived at the room, I felt like my pussy was dripping down my legs. Yes, I was looking forward to fucking the guy, and yes, he was an attractive, tall black man, but I couldn't stop thinking about what I was going to look like from my husband's viewpoint. All I could think about was giving him the best show I could think of.

There was no pretense in the room. The door was barely closed before I jumped on him, kissing him, and within a minute he was sitting on the bed, his large cock and balls in my mouth. He actually ended up being quite a bit larger than my husband, which was fine because I felt incredibly sexy gagging on a cock while being watched. The guy put his hand on my head, but he didn't need to-- I was already fucking my throat on him.

As much as I love sucking cock-- and I really do-- and as much as it turns out I love my husband watching me sucking cock, I really needed him in my pussy. I took my dress off, and he took his clothes off, and I lay on the bed next to him. He lay on his side, and I pulled my legs up and back to give my husband a view, and he slid his cock into me. My pussy took him easily, and he started to fuck me in front of my husband.

He was actually a really good fuck, and his dick felt great, but giving my husband a show was what was dominating my thoughts. Yes, he's seen me as we've fucked thousands of times, but I wanted him to see me as a total slut on someone else's cock. I didn't look at him, but I kept thinking about what I must look like, my legs spread back, taking dick, talking dirty. It was so intense, it didn't take long before my husband told the man I was about to cum-- and he was right. He knows me so well. I came hard.

After that, I rode him, first facing him, then facing my husband. I don't normally enjoy facing away when I'm on top, but sitting there facing my husband, legs spread, the man's cock pistoning in and out of me while I rubbed my swollen clit? Yeah, I came again fast.

At that point, though, I wanted to wrap it up.  I actually don't love marathon sex sessions, and as phenomenal as he felt, every single thrust made me want my husband more and more-- I wanted my husband to fuck his slut, tell me what a good slut I am, how sexy I am, how hot I looked cumming on someone's cock, and whatever other degrading praise he could come up with. So I held my hands out to my husband, who came over and gripped them, and we looked into each other's eyes as I started to grind and slam my cunt on the man inside me.

It didn't take long. I felt his fingers grip my waist, his pumping get more urgent, his cock get harder.  I slammed my hips on him harder, too, nodding at my husband. He nodded back, and I stared him in the eyes, repeating that I loved him, as I felt the man inside me start to cum. I often cum when I feel a man cumming in me, and my husband knew what was happening as my eyes rolled back and I started panting more than talking to him. I gripped my husband's hands hard and came harder as the stranger's cum filled me up.

When we were both done cumming, I asked my husband if he wanted to watch the pullout. Of course he did so I had my husband sit down and watch as I dismounted. It felt like I had a half gallon of cum in me, but it turned out to be both very thick and very deep, so I had to push a few times before a large glob fell out of my used hole. I could feel I still had a lot in me, so I squatted down with my legs spread, and told the man I wanted to clean his cock. I figured my husband would appreciate watching more of the thick cum drip out of me with a cock in my face. Even if he didn't, I was in the mood to be filthy, anyways.

After I was content that he had a good show, I got up and said I was going to go to the bathroom to clean up. That was my husband's signal to get the guy out of there. So I went to the bathroom and closed the door, and while I had every intention of cleaning up, I changed my mind. I was naked, my pussy was aching for my husband and smeared with cum, and I was in the mood to be dirrrrrrrty.  I shrugged, and instead of cleaning up, I laid a towel down, got on my knees with my ass in the air, and started to rub my pussy, waiting for my husband to come find me.

(Story not my own)

[sareeen]

And we meet again

Pairing: Eris Vanserra x fem!reader

Summary: Y/N, daughter of Nesta and Cassian, ventured into the Autumn Court again. But her old lover, to whom she had a tender bond, reappears and the overwhelming feelings that once broke them come back to the surface.

A/N: And here I am again. Months ago I promised you a story about Eris. Well, after a long time I managed to finish the chapter I started writing last year. I've been enjoying immensely writing it, especially the ending (badass ;) ) and relaxing a bit because I have an important exam on Tuesday.

I hope you guys will like it too, I'd love to read what you think about it.

English is not my first language so I apologize for any mistake. :)

...Eris, baby, let the game begin.

Y/N knew she shouldn't be here.

The Autumn Court had always been off limits to her, her family had told her throughout her childhood that she should never set foot in this area without someone with her.

However, she was a curious nature, so she did. With a smile on her face and her best friend by her side.

But now, five years later, she wasn't happy at all to be here.

The club her best friend had dragged her to was distinctly modern, the kind she had only seen on the Isle of Pearls, from which she had returned two months ago.

The loud, sensual music coming from the walls made Y/N dizzy. The lights were dimmed, creating an erotic atmosphere for the high-ceilinged room where hundreds of fairies were now crowded. The alcohol flowed, the laughter was loud and hands strayed to inappropriate places.

She moved further into the shadows of the corner, trying to attract as little attention as possible. She prayed for only one thing. That she would not meet him.

But as if the Great Mother was playing a mischievous joke on her, the mesmerizing amber eyes were now fixed on her, just as they had been when they first met years ago. Surprise flashed in them, and Eris made his way through the crowd. He didn't need to. The fairies themselves stood aside before the tall, imposing man, who was now heading straight for her.

"Y/N"

The name sounded so strange, yet all too familiar when it slipped out of the man's mouth, just as it had a thousand times before. Like the first time he'd kissed her and whispered her name. Or the time before he'd penetrated her and watched her with heavy, lust-filled eyes. Or after she'd left him and broken his heart.

Y/N had broken him in every way. When she stepped out the door and left him behind, he could almost hear Eris' heart shattering into tiny pieces, something she'd long thought didn't exist. But it did exist and he trusted her enough to give her the one thing that was truly his.

Y/N had to leave him, but it destroyed her perhaps more than Eris himself.

"Eris" Y/N felt numb, as if she were outside her body. The fact that he was so close to her, that she could smell his scent and his astonishing eyes on her, was driving her insane. Their relationship had been forbidden, perhaps even more so now after her family had found out three years ago and had done everything they could to end it.

Eris was saying something, but the loud music made it inaudible, so he leaned over to her ear. Y/N's body stiffened as she felt his breath on her ear and his hoarse voice.

"What are you doing here?"

Y/N looked at him, trying to make out the man's expression, but she couldn't see it clearly in the darkness.

"Balara dragged me away" she replied, but that didn't cover the whole truth. Deep in her heart she wanted to see him, just for a glimpse, to see if he was alright and move on. But Eris's look told the opposite story and he still looked at her as he had when they first met.

It was at a ball. She had heard of him as a child as a cruel and cunning man and had ignored him until they somehow drifted into each other's arms during a waltz. From there, there was no stopping them, their lives spinning just as they did on the dance floor. Correspondence turned into personal conversations, secret meetings even if they only saw each other for moments. Y/N was caught in a windmill that eventually became a hurricane. It was sweeping, devastating.

Eris held his hand as if unable to resist touching it. When their skins touched again, Y/N's heart surged, like a teenager touching a man for the first time. A wry smile tugged at her lips at the thought, for after all, Eris was the first man other than her family members to touch her.

Eris pulled Y/N behind him, who followed. As she always did.

Y/N caught a glimpse of her friend, who was not far away from her in the middle of a men's wreath. Balara nodded at her, which made Y/N's stomach churn. There was another reason they were here now. She was about to do something that every cell in her body was against and she felt dirty. As she thought about it she felt her palms begin to sweat, which Eris sensed and turned back to her. He smoothed back his red hair, now cut into short locks, with the hand he wasn't holding Y/N with. Y/N's palm itched to poke it and adjust it herself.

"Don't be afraid," he said softly, so that Y/N could barely make it out in the noise. The next word she read his lips rather than heard. "Please."

Y/N's throat constricted, unable to get the words out, so she just shook her head. She wasn't afraid of him, Great Mother, she was terrified of herself, afraid that she would collapse on the floor in a moment.

Eris dragged her down a dimly lit corridor and then abruptly dragged her through a door into a dark room. Y/N shrieked in shock, but what happened next chilled her.

He bent down to take her lips. Y/N had a familiar feeling she had always felt around him. Her limbs felt weak, as if her legs didn't want to support her weight, her heart jumped out of her chest and she almost shook with excitement. The way he kissed her was...it was like coming home again. It was soft, warm. Welcoming. Y/N lifted her hand and placed it on Eris's lightly stubbled face, which told her that he probably hadn't shaved this morning. This little thing, knowing him so well, brought tears to her eyes. She missed him.

"Eris," Y/N whispered as they parted. "We can't..."

Eris cut her off.

"To the Cauldron" he breathed and brushed his breath gently over her cheek as if he feared she would disappear at any moment. "I missed you so terribly."

Y/N's felt like a dagger stabbed into her heart at those words. She too suffered terribly from his absence. So much so that she was unable to think of anyone else, to move on. She was as much his prisoner as he was hers. But they could never have each other, and they had to accept that. Y/N tore away from him, groping at the wall, trying to find the door, but Eris clung to her from behind and wouldn't let her. His tall, muscular body trapped Y/N, who finally gave up and snuggled up to him.

"Why are you here?" he asked seriously after minutes of silence. His voice filled the pitch-black, silent room. Y/N swallowed hard, her stomach twisted.

"I told you. We're here to party."

Eris squeezed her gently and drew her even closer. He was almost pulling her into him.

"Don't lie to me, Y/N" he whispered ominously. His magic pulsed, his body heated with the destructive fire inside him, capable of turning the whole damn building into a blazing heap of rubble in an instant. "I know you. I know every twitch, every breath, every muscle in your body. I want to know what you want."

Y/N closed her eyes in agony. To hell with the man for knowing her so well.

"I want you, Eris," she hissed, then placed her hand on his steel-hard forearm and squeezed. "Only you."

He hummed and kissed her hair, then inhaled her scent.

"Whatever you say, my love," he murmured, which made every hair on Y/N's body stand on fire. "But I'm going to find out what you intend to do by coming to me again."

"Eris" Y/N was about to protest but he shut her mouth.

"Just so you know" he leaned in close enough to whisper the words into her skin. "This time I'll break you and not the other way round."

And so their game began again. Neither of them knew which of their shattered hearts would end up even more destroyed.

[hischierswhore]

ahh! christian seeing reader for the first time after the break up in the club with another guy, he goes up to her and comforts her about moving on way too quickly and she’s like this is my cousin

a ruined night out

pairing: Christian Pulisic x Reader

TW: cursing

A/N: angst & Christian don’t go together in my head. he is my baby and he must be protected at all costs ☹️

It'd been around 2 weeks since your very traumatic breakup with Christian. The only thing you'd done since then was cry, and your friends were beyond tired of seeing you so down in the dumps.

Your friends invited you out in attempt to lift your spirit. You went, even though you had no desire to go out. You put on some jeans and a nice top, paired with some black heels.

Your hair was curled into cute waves that bounced when you moved. You looked at yourself in the mirror and give a satisfied smile. You felt pretty and it made you feel better, despite how depressed you still felt about your recent breakup.

You grabbed your purse and headed out the door.

When you got to the club, you were surprised to see your cousin Andy waiting for you.

"Hey Y/n!" He shouted over he loud music as he brought you into a hug.

"Andy! It's so nice to see you again!" You said as you squeezed him tight. Andy was more like an older brother to you than a cousin.

You both continued conversation, not noticing the large group of football players that had just entered the club.

Your friends had arrived and you all danced together throughout the night. When you decided to take a break, you went to the closest booth and sat next to Andy, talking about plans you both had coming up.

Unbeknownst to you, Christian was among the group of footballers that had entered nearly 25 minutes prior. He had seen your friends, and thought that maybe you would be here too.

As he scanned the room, he spotted you... with another guy.

At first, his mind refused to believe what his eyes were telling him. He'd broken up with you only 2 weeks ago. There was no way you could've moved on so fast if you actually loved him like you said you did. But there you were, sitting and talking to some random guy that probably didn't give two shits about you.

Christian stared at you with disgust, but what hurt worse was the fact that you weren't alone. With a disgusted look, he left the group of footballers and headed towards where you sat with this "friend."

"What the hell, Y/n?!" Christian shouted.

"Christian?" You answered, looking up at him in shock.

"The breakup clearly didn't affect you, huh?" He spoke as you whispered for Andy to excuse you both and give you a minute. You grabbed Christian's arm and dragged him towards the bathroom.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Christian?!" You shouted over the booming music.

"I should be asking you that! We've been broken up for 2 weeks and you're already with a new guy?"

"Chris it's not-" You tried to get out but were interrupted.

"When you said you loved me, did you even mean it?"

"Christian shut up!" You shouted at him to get him to not interrupt you, his Adams apple bobbing slightly as he waited for you to speak.

"First of all, I did love you. There was never a time in which I said it but never meant it, so for you to assume that I didn't mean it is extremely fucking low of you" You started.

"Second of all, if you would've fucking asked me before starting this, that 'new guy' I was with is my cousin!" You shouted at him as his mouth formed an 'o' shape.

"Y/n I didn't know-"

"Clearly! I don't know why you're making assumptions, Chris. We're not even together anymore. Did you forget that you broke up with me?"

"No I haven't forgotten, Y/n." He sighed exasperatedly.

"So stop trying to control who I hang out with and who I talk to. He's literally my cousin, for fucks sake" Silence filled the space between the two of you.

"I hope you know this was the first time I've actually gone out since we broke up. I was having a great time until you barged over and interrupted my night"

And with that, you stormed back to the booth, leaving Christian shocked and more heartbroken that ever.

[randomvarious]

1997 London Playlist

Back with some dance goodies from '97 that came from the world's most musically vibrant city, London, where all sorts of electronic genres were able to flourish quite unlike anywhere else in the world at the time. This week I added a deep breakbeat banger to the Spotify version of this playlist by a duo called Drum Club, who in '92 released their original version of "U Make Me Feel So Good" on dance legend William Orbit's pioneering progressive house label, Guerilla. Five years later, though, Drum Club's own Lol Hammond, aka Girl Eats Boy, remixed the song for a re-release on another UK progressive house label called Jackpot too, which gave us this beaut that laid its drum breaks over a super soothingly satisfying backdrop of lush strings and soft, subtle horn, as the sampled vocal from the original version made its grand return 😌. Currently unjustifiably sitting at less than 1,000 plays.

The Drum Club - "You Make Me Feel So Good (Girl Eats Boy mix)"

And then for the YouTube update, I added that one, plus another couple Guerilla remixes that can't be found on Spotify too, including a trance take on West London group React 2 Rhythm's 1991 song, "Intoxication," that was done by the legendary duo of John Digweed & Nick Muir, aka Bedrock, that's currently only sitting at 3.6K+ plays; and a progressive house mix of UK duo Fuzzy Logic's 1992 tune, "Obsession," that was done by the trio of Shango and Danny Howells, which is pushing towards 4.3K plays. "Intoxication" has this lovely bed of colliding and stringy synths that Bedrock drop a bunch of bleepy and old school knob-twiddling acid on top of, and then "Obsession" is one of those tunes that's good for slotting into the middle of a mix to maintain a steady vibe before you really start to ramp up to a mesmerizing climax. It lingers for a bit, but after its breakdown, it adds some nice string pads to complete the whole thing. Vocalist Erire dips into some gravelly passion and some aquatic organ work is mixed in too 👍.

React 2 Rhythm - "Intoxication (Nick Muir & John Digweed's Bedrock mix)" Fuzzy Logic - "Obsession (Shango & Danny Howells' Illogical Infactuation mix)"

And this playlist is also on YouTube Music.

So, three new tracks added in total this week, from three separate dance genres, all of which were remixes of songs that were originally released on the great Guerilla label. Spotify version of the playlist is now at 14 songs that clock in at 91 minutes, but over on YouTube, we're now at 25 songs that clock in at 173 minutes. So if you want a whole lot more of that dope 1997 London underground stuff, check out the YouTube playlist!

And here's the list of comps and mixes that I've used so far to put this playlist together:

Goth's Undead (1997, Cleopatra Records) 00 : 50 (1997, Soma Quality Recordings) Monsieur Dimitri's De-Luxe House of Funk by Dimitri From Paris (1997, DMC Publishing Ltd.) Jackpot Presents Guerilla by Phil Perry & Danny Howells (1997, Jackpot) Skampler (2001, Skam) Soma Quality Recordings - Volume 4 (1997, Soma Quality Recordings) Club H Vol.2 by Harry the Bastard (2000, Statra Recordings) Hi:Fidelity Lounge - Volume One: Subterranean Soundtracks (1999, Guidance Recordings) Eclectic Electric (2000, eMusic) Spundae Presents Interpretations by Jerry Bonham (1998, Spundae) DJ-Kicks: by Kid Loco (1999, !K7) 4am Eternal (A Truly Twisted Post-Club Chill-Out Selection) by Osymyso (2000, Mixmag) Amberdelic Space II: Angel of Ecstasy (1997, Dressed to Kill) Alt. Frequencies Presents Disco Moonlight (1997, Worm Interface) Essential Selection, Vol. One by Fatboy Slim & Paul Oakenfold (2000, London Records 90) E=wMC2000: The Equation For Quantum Groove Theory (2000, eMusic) A Jedi's Night Out by Tom Middleton (1999. DMC / Mixer) Architecture Volume 2 by Terry Francis (1998, Pagan Records)

And here's some links to more 90s London playlists too:

1992: YouTube / YouTube Music 1994: YouTube / YouTube Music 1995: YouTube / YouTube Music 1996: Spotify / YouTube / YouTube Music 1998: Spotify / YouTube / YouTube Music 1999: YouTube / YouTube Music

Breakbeat update next week!

Enjoy!

More to come, eventually. Stay tuned!

Like what you hear? Follow me on Spotify and YouTube for more cool playlists and uploads!

[highly-opinionated-art]

I wanna share with you guys some traditional art I've been making recently- since November I've been doing this album-of-the-week thing, and a few weeks into the year I started picking out my favorite line from the album of the week and doing a little illustration for it. If you can call it that- they're just quick, rough little pictures, more experimental than polished. Some are better than others. But I have some watercolors and acrylic paints that I never used before this project, and a hell of a lot of markers and gel pens and colored pencils that need to be used, too. I've been learning a lot and getting some use out of what I have at the same time, so that's good enough for me! Here's the first quarter of 2024 done:

Albums/artists/lyrics under the cut, plus some additional commentary because why not.

(2024 part 2) (2024 part 3)

Week 1: "I wanna be what my body wants me to be" is from the song Townie, from the album bury me at makeout creek by mitski. I actually kinda hated this whole album, but Townie is a tolerable song.

Week 2: "it never hurts to give thanks to the local gods, you never know who might be hungry" is from the song Younger, from the album In League With Dragons, by the Mountain Goats. Mixed feelings about the album. Mostly just mad that I can't just put a mostly transparent blue layer over everything when I want it to look like night with watercolor the way I can with digital art.

Week 3: "that we won't run, and we won't run, and we won't run" is from the song King And Lionheart, from the album My Head Is An Animal by Of Monsters And Men, which is a meh album but I love this song.

Week 4: "Make it a dirt dance floor again" is from the song Bleed It Out, from the album Minutes to Midnight by Linkin Park. GREAT album. The art looks just like poop but I swear the paint came out of the tube like that, I didn't mix it with anything or anything!

Week 5: "gotta be more to life than just try, try, try" from the song Half A Mile Away, from the album 52nd Street by Billy Joel. This was actually the first one I made, I went back and did the first 4 a little later.

Week 6: "I'm gonna keep on dancing" is from the song Pink Pony Club, from the album The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess by Chappell Roan. The album is ok, I guess? Not my favorite but this track is a really good one.

Week 7: "maybe they'll love me when I finally get out of this town" is from the song Made For This, from the album Built To Last, by Arrows in Action, which is a FANTASTIC album, like DAMN.

Week 8: "together, Wendy, we can live with the sadness, I love you with all the madness in my soul" is from the song Born To Run, by the album of the same name by Bruce Springsteen. It was really hard to get a picture of this one for some reason. Metallic gel pen might have something to do with it.

Week 9: "inside, everybody's hiding something" is from the song Slide, from the album No Angel by Dido. I LOVE Dido. I meant to add more masks in the picture, ok. I got lazy. I should have just made the other ones bigger...

Week 10: "tomorrow's just another day" is from the song Don't Cry 2020 (which was released in 2017), from the album How Will You Know If You Never Try by the band COIN. Forgettable album, but the art is of my room, but I didn't get up and walk 10 steps to get a reference, just did it from memory. The window is too small and not in the right place, and I just changed up the patterns on the blanket because I didn't feel like checking.

Week 11: "if it's ever gonna happen, it's gotta happen here I am" (which seems like it should be missing a comma, but it's like that on purpose) is from the song Shine On Me, from the album Pure Fiction by Eric Hutchinson (not his best work I fear).

Week 12: "make new symbols, make new signs" is from the title track from the album New Beginning, by Tracy Chapman. AMAZING album, I loved it. I'm completely pissed that I messed up the art, though. I thought I had it going for me. Boo.

Week 13: "I don't look important, so they're telling me to wait" is from the song WaldorfWorldwide, from Good Charlotte's self titled debut album. Self portrait of me, a teacher, being mistaken for a student at an event, which is a frequent and frustrating occurrence. This album is ok, but I think they were pretty clearly still developing at this point in their career.